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Hi everyone. I'm Cae (not my legal name so I don't mind sharing it), I'm afab nonbinary (they/them). I had a different account once but I forgot my login and had to make a new one. I'm a survivor of CSA, SA, and as of last month R***. I'm still trying to wrap my head around that last one. It was at the hands of my bf who I thought could never do such a thing and I've been really struggling lately and I've had no one I could talk to about it. I think I never truly believed it would happen to me until it did. 

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Hello, @BrokenEnby! Welcome (back) to AS! I'm glad you found your way back here. If you remember any details about your old account, please let us moderators know in the Help Desk, and we can help you get it back if you'd like. We can merge your two accounts. :) So yeah, please let us know there if you would like that done.

I'm so, so sorry about what you've experienced. And for you to have been r* so recently...I'm sorry. I'm sure it's very difficult to wrap your head around. Something so fresh, and by someone who should've loved and protected you. I'm so sorry. You are not alone here...you will find lots of very friendly and supportive members in this community. I wish you all the best on your healing journey. ❤️ 

-Finchy

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Dear cae

 

Welcome to After Silence.  I am sorry to hear of the trauma you have been through!

 

Being here has helped me so much.   Everyone is so caring and supportive here.  I am proud of you for reaching out.  I know that is hard to do.  I also know that you will find that needed compassion and support here within our community.  Know we are here for you and we will listen whenever you would like to lean on us.    

 

Take care and please do not hesitate to ask for any help if you ever need it.  

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Hi Cae, 

Welcome back. I'm sorry that you have been experiencing trauma. It must be especially hard since it was done by someone you thought you could trust. This site is still filled with so many kind and caring people that are here to support you. You are not alone here. Please know that what happened to you was not your fault. 

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22 hours ago, BrokenEnby said:

Hi everyone. I'm Cae (not my legal name so I don't mind sharing it), I'm afab nonbinary (they/them). I had a different account once but I forgot my login and had to make a new one. I'm a survivor of CSA, SA, and as of last month R***. I'm still trying to wrap my head around that last one. It was at the hands of my bf who I thought could never do such a thing and I've been really struggling lately and I've had no one I could talk to about it. I think I never truly believed it would happen to me until it did. 

Hi Cae,

Welcome back to the community. I'm sorry for your past traumas, and now the most recent one. It is never ok for someone to hurt you like that. He was a jerk to break your trust and your heart. I'm not sure how long ago you were here, but I do see this the same supportive place as in years past. I'm glad you remembered you are always welcome here. 

I wish you the best as you continue down this path we call healing.

Mary

:aswelcomesu:  back.  

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29 minutes ago, MeBeMary said:

Hi Cae,

Welcome back to the community. I'm sorry for your past traumas, and now the most recent one. It is never ok for someone to hurt you like that. He was a jerk to break your trust and your heart. I'm not sure how long ago you were here, but I do see this the same supportive place as in years past. I'm glad you remembered you are always welcome here. 

I wish you the best as you continue down this path we call healing.

Mary

:aswelcomesu:  back.  

Thank you so much, Mary. I discovered AS sometime this past year so my first account was still relatively new. I think it probably only had one or two posts on it. Back when I was only dealing with assault, I found it very hard to talk about what happened to me because imposter syndrome constantly tried to convince me I was faking it or that it wasn't as bad as it seemed. Now that it's escalated to me dealing with r***, I'm realizing how important it is to surround myself with people that understand and won't judge me, regardless of the extremity of my tragedies. 

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Sadly, that is common. You would be surprised how many people go thru this. It's the one drawback of a place like this...we constantly compare. When we do that, we tend to talk ourselves out of the support we do deserve. Tho I am glad you found your way back, I'm sorry you fell into the trap many of us do. 

I'm sorry you endured additional trauma but do know all your trauma is validated here. You deserve support on your most recent trauma, as well as ones further in the past. Take it as you go, tho. If you need to concentrate more on healing from the hurt your ex inflicted right now, that is ok. There is no right or wrong way in healing...as long as you are looking for that path that will take you there. Remember too, we walk with you.

Safe hugs, if ok. :hug:  

 

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On 11/28/2022 at 4:33 AM, BrokenEnby said:

Hi everyone. I'm Cae (not my legal name so I don't mind sharing it), I'm afab nonbinary (they/them). I had a different account once but I forgot my login and had to make a new one. I'm a survivor of CSA, SA, and as of last month R***. I'm still trying to wrap my head around that last one. It was at the hands of my bf who I thought could never do such a thing and I've been really struggling lately and I've had no one I could talk to about it. I think I never truly believed it would happen to me until it did. 

Hello and welcome here, I am Wanna :flowers:

Good thing you came back here, it indeed sounds like you could use all support you can get. I am proud of you for seeking help so soon after what happened, and standing up for yourself by using your voice. I hope you are safe from that bf and have people who can look after you. 

You decide your own pace here, when you want to share and what. Just know we are here for you, and we believe you. I am sorry about all of your traumas, that should never have happened. But this community is here to unload your burden, helping you to find healthy coping. :notalone:

Make sure to take good care, okay? You can PM me any time with questions or for some company. 

Stay safe, W ☀️

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