My introduction

[Lilo2002]

Hello everyone!

I'm new here and even though everyone else has created a similar post I felt that it was an important step for me to formally introduce myself here.

I am a survivor of sexual assault by an ex partner.

Just typing that out is helping me let go of some of the pain I've bottled up inside over the past few years. That is the first time I called myself a survivor in any context. For a long time I was in denial of what happened and refused to accept it as a part of myself but that only made things worse. I worked with a therapist in the past and made great progress but some things happened over the past year and a half that made me realize I was lacking a sense of understanding from someone who knows what I experienced.

I knew I wanted to make more effort in healing from my trauma but what I really needed was to find a community like this where my thoughts and feelings wouldn't seem foreign. I'm sorry that such horrific things happen to so many awesome people in this forum but I believe the silver lining is that we all found each other. I really needed to find other survivors that I can eventually share my story with and vent to so I wouldn't feel so alone during my healing progress. I haven't really done a lot to interact with other people yet but I've been reading a lot of posts and am blown away by the depth of support that exists here. 

Thank you to anyone who reads this and for you support ♡♡♡

[missfrier]

QDear lilo2002

 

I would like to welcome you to After Silence's forums.  We are all here for you and want to support you in any way we can. I know that posting for the first time can be scary.  Please don't worry, though; you will always be given so much support from our lovely community and its members.  You're not alone - we are with you.

 

You will soon receive an official welcome message in your inbox.  Please feel free to respond to that PM if you have any questions about the forum or if you need some help finding your way around the site. 

 

Take care and keep reaching out!! 

 

 

 

 

[Capulet]

Welcome to AS, @Lilo2002! 

I'm called Cap and I'm one of the site's moderators.  I'd like to offer a welcome hug (if okay) as well as let you know that though I don't know you very well just yet, I am proud of you for releasing some of your pain.  It can be incredibly freeing and empowering to speak these difficult words, even if you're doing so by typing.

Joining a community like this one is never an easy step to take - I remember it being absolutely terrifying!  Yet, here you are - congratulations on taking this huge leap into the healing direction and for finding that voice within.  

You're absolutely right - it takes a village. 😉  This community has become a second home for me and honestly, I don't know what I'd do without the friends I've made here.  I feel heard, validated and much, MUCH less alone.  It is my hope that you, too, will feel comfort by being among others who understand.  We're happy to have you.  

You'll soon hear from a member of the Newbie Support Team - she'll send you a bunch of helpful links and will be able to answer any questions, should any pop up.   Until then, feel free to take your time looking around.  I am just a shout away if you need help with anything.

Looking forward to getting to know you!

Best wishes,
Capulet

[snmls]

Hi @Lilo2002

Welcome to AS. I'm sorry for the trauma you have experienced, but I am glad that you found the site and decided to join. This is a wonderful community filled with kind and caring people. We are all here to help each other heal. Acknowledging what happened and that you are a survivor is a big first step. It is normal for survivors to take months or years to do that. It is not an easy thing to do, but it is the first step in the healing process. Sometimes talking with other survivors can be helpful in the healing process. It can help you to feel less alone and validate some of the emotions you are experiencing. 

You are welcome to take your time looking around the site. When you are ready, you can post and share on the forums as much as you want. Just reading other posts is fine too. If you need any help navigating the site, don't be afraid to reach out. Wishing you all the best. 

[MeBeMary]

Hi Lilo, 

Welcome to AfterSilence.  I am very sorry you were hurt by someone who should have been someone you trusted. It is never right for anyone to ever hurt another like this, and if anything...I am glad you are away from him and are now finding the courage to acknowledge what has happened. Many of us have tried to deny, like you, but I think (in my own retrospect) that it causes many additional struggles and perhaps we just don't name the cause. 

This post is a wonderful first step. When reaching out, it truly is a step forward...one of many that I hope you find in this journey. Feel free to look around and interact where you feel the most comfortable. Wishing you the best as you continue down this healing path.

Mary

[Finchy]

Welcome to AS, @Lilo2002!  First off, your avatar is super cute! I haven't watched any of the Mandalorian, but I know the cuteness of Baby Yoda haha. I'm glad you found your way here!

I'm so sorry for the trauma that you've experienced, though. Just typing out what you've been through is a big step towards healing. It's very difficult. I, too, more or less pushed aside what I went through and disregarded it. Only very recently (like a month or 2 ago??) did I really come to terms with it being abuse/trauma. None of us deserved what happened to us. We all come together with similarities and differences, and AS is a great place to find support. You're not alone. I'm glad you've already seen the amount of support that can be shared here.

Best wishes!

-Finch

[WannaMoveOn]

Hello @Lilo2002 and welcome to After Silence, I am Wanna

I am sincerely sorry about your trauma and pain. Please know that you carry no guilt in this.

We seldom understand right away what happened to us, and just getting past denial takes a lot of effort. Every healing journey is different,  but I believe every survivor should have a community to bounce back on. You describe it so wonderfully yourself, silver lining is that we can connect, relate and support. You've probably noticed that we talk about pretty much anything here. You can share whatever you'd like 

I am so happy you chose this platform as your community. I hope this will complete your support system in the way you wish. 

All best

- Wanna ☀️

[8888]

Welcome @Lilo2002 to After Silence.  I’m sorry for what brought you here but I’m happy you are here reaching out for support.  Good job taking this step in your healing process.  You are not alone and what happened to you wasn’t your fault.  Take your time exploring and post when you are ready.  If you have any questions feel free to message me. 

[Lilo2002]

Thank you to everyone for making me feel so welcomed. I've had a hard time just reading some of the responses because the support is overwhelming in a good way. I don't have family to talk to about this and my close friends don't understand what's going on to talk to about this either so having this much support makes me more optimistic about making more progress in healing.  ♡♡♡♡♡♡