Hi - Another Newbie

[Novu]

Hello,

I'm not really sure how to introduce myself here or what the normal etiquette is in this type of situation. I never used to be an anxious person but I tend to worry a lot more than I used to now.

I'm Novu (at least on here) and I'm a survivor who 3 years on still struggles to talk about what happened and has actually only managed to tell 1 person. I'm hoping that finding a supportive community to be part of will help me move forward with this. 

[MeBeMary]

Hi Novu,

Welcome to AfterSilence. I am very sorry for what you have endured three years ago and the struggles you are currently dealing with. You will find much support and understanding here. You are not alone. Your introduction is perfectly fine for this forum. Once you find your way into the private forums you can interact in how it feels comfortable to you. The typical etiquette you will find here really is just that we be respectable to one another. You will find for the most part, it's already ingrained in most of us, as I am sure it is with you.

Do also know that what you feel is normal...both in what happened to you and the anxiousness on reaching out or sharing to others. You can take as much time as you need, you will not be pressured, but I do encourage you to look around. This community is filled with so many kind individuals and hope you feel at home here soon.

It was a big step for you to reach out here. I wish you the best as you begin to more forward on the path of healing.

Mary

[ToyahW]

Hi Novu

Welcome, I'm a newbie too so I think we've both come to the right place. I'm so sorry that you have been suffering in silence and that you had to suffer at all.

Like you, I struggle to find the language, right time, right place, right person to share. I've told the police, my T (therapist), 2 T's in fact and I'm in AA so my AA sponsor knows. I'm still debating with myself around who needs to know and why. Perhaps speaking on here will make it easier to keep it private elsewhere but sometimes I think the more I tell, the less power it has, like my AA status. Hhhm, the debate continues.

Anyway, welcome, hope to chat with you again and be well.

 

Toyah

[Novu]

Thank you both for the lovely welcomes

I think you're right Toyah; in that the more we try to talk about it all, the less power it will have. But I'm also a bit worried that it might give it more at least initially. 

[missfrier]

Dear novu

 

I am sorry for all that you have been through.   You have been so brave in reaching out to us, please know that this is never easy!   We are all here for you and we want to support you.  You're not alone in your healing journey and are always welcome to lean on us for extra support.  You can post as much or as little as you like.  We are here to support you in the way you need.  I have found this community to be very helpful.  Everyone is so understanding and non-judgmental and I am hoping you feel the same way once you've gotten to know us a little.   

 

All my best,

missfrier

 

 

[8888]

Welcome @Novu to After Silence.  I’m sorry for what brought you here but I’m happy you are here reaching out for support.  Good job taking this step in your healing process.  You are not alone and what happened to you wasn’t your fault.  Take your time exploring and post when you are ready.  There's no rush to talk about anything but hopefully when you feel ready it will be beneficial for you.  If you have any questions feel free to message me. 

[Novu]

Thank you everyone for being so welcoming! 

[WannaMoveOn]

21 hours ago, Novu said:

Hello,

I'm not really sure how to introduce myself here or what the normal etiquette is in this type of situation. I never used to be an anxious person but I tend to worry a lot more than I used to now.

I'm Novu (at least on here) and I'm a survivor who 3 years on still struggles to talk about what happened and has actually only managed to tell 1 person. I'm hoping that finding a supportive community to be part of will help me move forward with this. 

Hi @Novu, I am Wanna   I am glad you've found us. I sounds like you have been through a lot. I am deeply sorry about your trauma and what comes with. Please know that none of what happened is your fault. We believe you. 

I am so proud of you for starting to share. Telling somebody, especially the first time, can be very difficult. You shouldn't be alone in this, and After Silence invites all kinds of survivors. When healing, things tend to go up and down in life, and this community is here for all kinds of days. 

Stay safe, sending my warmest welcomes! 

- Wanna ☀️

[Novu]

Thank you @WannaMoveOn - I still feel quite conflicted about someone else knowing, and whilst I guess that probably is quite normal that doesn't mean it makes it any more comfortable. 

[WannaMoveOn]

23 minutes ago, Novu said:

Thank you @WannaMoveOn - I still feel quite conflicted about someone else knowing, and whilst I guess that probably is quite normal that doesn't mean it makes it any more comfortable. 

I understand that feeling. The situation on its own is very confusing and hard, and sharing can make you feel vulnerable. This is a safe place, we are anonymous and you don't have to share what you'd like to keep private. Feel free to have a look around the site, maybe you'll find that someone has similar experiences. Relating sometimes makes it easier.