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I'm new and scared


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I've repressed what happened my whole life.  Recently, I started having really bad anxiety, and my therapist thinks its related to what happened to me as a child.  I've been to therapy a few times, and it's to the point where I'll start to talk about what specifically happened, and I'm really, really scared.  I know I have to do this, but I am still so scared.

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@jordanc0856

Fear is a natural reaction with what you have been through. Repression was your way of coping at the time. It is very scary to begin your healing journey but it will be worth it in the end. You are so brave to make your post. Please know you are not alone. We are all here to support you and sit with you during your times of fear and anxiety. We are here to support your triumphs as well. Healing is an emotional roller coaster. I understand your fear. I’ve been seeing my T for over 2 years now and  still haven’t managed to get to all the heavy stuff. Every time we would discuss dealing with the traumas next visit, I would have a really rough week so we had to deal with that instead. It was my way of not having to face everything because facing everything means that all the emotion will come out I didn’t think I was strong enough to handle it. I recently started facing my traumas a little at a time and it’s rough and it’s scary but the support I’ve received here has helped tremendously. It helps to know there’s always someone here to support you. I think all of us are stronger than we think we are. By coming here and reaching out and by seeing a T, you are showing a tremendous amount of bravery and strength. Whenever you are feeling scared, know that we are here supporting you and sitting with you. Sending safe hugs if okay. 

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Hi Jordan,

Welcome to AfterSilence. I am very sorry for what happened to you as a child and the struggles you are going thru now. It was not your fault and it was completely undeserved. Facing trauma is never easy. It can be scary and confusing...and very, very brave to try and face it. In many ways, you carry that frighten little boy with you, too.

I am glad you have found our community. You will find tons of support here, as our members are understanding and kind. Take your time to look around and interact where you feel comfortable. I wish you the best on taking many steps forward on this path we call healing.

Mary

:youcanheal:

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Dear jordan

 

I am sorry for all that you have been through.   You have been so brave in reaching out to us, please know that this is never easy!   We are all here for you and we want to support you.  You're not alone in your healing journey and are always welcome to lean on us for extra support.  You can post as much or as little as you like.  We are here to support you in the way you need.  I have found this community to be very helpful.  Everyone is so understanding and non-judgmental and I am hoping you feel the same way once you've gotten to know us a little.   

 

All my best,

missfrier

 

 

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5 hours ago, jordanc0856 said:

I've repressed what happened my whole life.  Recently, I started having really bad anxiety, and my therapist thinks its related to what happened to me as a child.  I've been to therapy a few times, and it's to the point where I'll start to talk about what specifically happened, and I'm really, really scared.  I know I have to do this, but I am still so scared.

I am new to After Silence as well. I am scared as well. You are not alone. 

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6 hours ago, jordanc0856 said:

I've repressed what happened my whole life.  Recently, I started having really bad anxiety, and my therapist thinks its related to what happened to me as a child.  I've been to therapy a few times, and it's to the point where I'll start to talk about what specifically happened, and I'm really, really scared.  I know I have to do this, but I am still so scared.

Hello, I am Wanna :flowers:

Starting to open up about repressed trauma is a significant step. Being scared and worried is completely normal, although you shouldn't have to be. I am truly sorry for your pain and struggle. You have my sympathies and respect. I hope you will find yourself a safe spot here, a place where you can feel free to share anything.

You seem to have set your mind on attending your healing journey. I am rooting for you. :notalone:You can PM me any time! 

Hope to see you around. A warm welcome to you! 

- Wanna ☀️

Edited by WannaMoveOn
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Welcome @jordanc0856 to After Silence.  It's understandable to be scared.  I’m sorry for what brought you here but I’m happy you are here reaching out for support.  Good job taking this step in your healing process.  You are not alone and what happened to you wasn’t your fault.  Take your time exploring and post when you are ready.  If you have any questions feel free to message me. 

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  • 2 weeks later...

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