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Mira97

Hello there...

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Hi, everyone.

I originally made this account a year ago when I was really struggling again after not really having any issues in years and wanted to post but wasn't ready to.

(I also buried down what had happened again until some old wounds were reopened recently).

It's still hard to think or talk about, but I think I am more ready this time. 

Last night, for the first time ever, I told my best friend my full story. I had told her vague parts before when I needed to get it off my chest, but this time I had told her both old and new secrets. Stuff I had never even talked about aloud to anyone before.

I am slightly paranoid to be here and fear having someone I know somehow figuring out it's me but I really like how this site is set up. 

I've read quite a few posts around here and it's really such a relief to see those who have had some of the exact same thoughts and emotions that I have. It makes me feel a little less lonely.

 

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I think I may have been very wrong trying this out again. My anxiety is kicked into over drive and I think I'm going to throw up. It's way too much. 
I don't know how so many of ya'll do it. 

I've got to go... and might not post back for a while.

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Dear @Mira97

I am sorry for all that you have been through.   You have been so brave in reaching out to us, please know that this is never easy!   We are all here for you and we want to support you.  You're not alone in your healing journey and are always welcome to lean on us for extra support.  You can post as much or as little as you like.  We are here to support you in the way you need.  I have found this community to be very helpful.  Everyone is so understanding and non-judgmental and I am hoping you feel the same way once you've gotten to know us a little.   

All my best,
missfrier

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Welcome @Mira97 to After Silence.  I’m sorry for what brought you here but I’m happy you are here reaching out for support.  Good job taking this step in your healing process.  You are not alone and what happened to you wasn’t your fault.  Take your time exploring and post when you are ready.  I'm happy to hear you were able to disclose some stuff to your friend.  We all have aliases here so there's not too much of a chance of being found.  I'm sorry to hear you are having anxiety.  Please take care of yourself.  If you have any questions feel free to message me. 

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Hi Mira,

Welcome to AfterSilence. I am sorry you have reasons to be here and are struggling. I do understand anxiety and not being found out, but as 8888 mentioned, with the an alias, it may be difficult. If the user name is something that causes concern, you can ask at our help desk to change it to something less identifying. We have members from different parts of the world, as well, so this makes it more difficult to be discovered, as well.

We are also secure in most forums can only be viewed by registered members (this is not one of them, please let us know if moving to another forum will assure you more). You not need to reveal anything you are not comfortable with and you will not be asked to. I know it can be difficult reaching out and we do not want you feeling you are pressured. Take your time, look around. Sometimes reading other similar posting can help just to let you know you are not alone.

I do hope you give this community a chance, but if you fell now is still not the time, it is respected. Do know our doors are always open to you.

Wishing you well on your path of healing.

Mary

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Dear @Mira97,

I'm sorry for the suffering that's brought you here and for the anxiety.  I can assure you, we all know what that's like.

It took years for me to be able to tell anyone what happened, and still, most of my family and friends don't know the full story.  I can't even talk about what happened without getting short of breath and having my heart beat hard in my chest.  

If you feel anxious, remember there is no pressure to post - you can still log on and read and do whatever feels comfortable.  Sometimes it's comforting to read other people's stories and just know that you're not alone.  I've had times when I've posted and times when I just want to hear from others.  

This is a kind and supportive (and anonymous) community and we're all here to support each other in whatever way we need.

Blessings to you,

Gold Raindrops

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Hi, @Mira97 - 

Welcome to After Silence. I'm so sorry you're having so much fear and anxiety about posting here. I know it was really scary for me to post when I first joined too! If you're worried about your identity, just make sure you don't post in the public forums. Everything else is only visible to registered members. You are safe here. This community is full of wonderful and supportive people that want to help you. 

I'm hoping that you will come back and read these responses and feel more reassured. I want you to be able to truly feel the love this site provides. If you have any questions or if there's anything we can do to help you feel more safe, please let us know. I am happy to help in any way I can! 

Wishing you all the best,
Poppy

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