Hello

[feralcat]

Hi, I've just recently found After Silence, I wish I had found you folks years ago. You all have such courage and wisdom. I've kept my trauma and its dark aftermath pretty much to myself for so long I don't really even have words to talk about it. Just pain and alone-ness.  I'm hoping if I can experience some understanding and support from other survivors I can make progress healing. And become part of a caring group and support other people on their healing journeys.

[rakit]

Hello @feralcat  I'm so sorry you have to be here, and I'm very glad you've reached out to get support on your healing journey. Welcome to After Silence, which is full of supportive, helpful people who care about you getting better.

[Capulet]

Hi @feralcat - Welcome to After Silence.  I am so sorry to learn you have trauma in your background, but am hoping that you will take comfort in knowing that you have found a truly supportive community in AS.  It is truly a freeing feeling to release some of what you have been holding onto for so long - and although I do not know you very well, yet, I'm proud of you for taking this truly gigantic step toward healing!

You should be contacted by a member of our Newbie Support Team shortly.  Until then, if you need any assistance, I'm just a shout away.

Again, welcome.  Happy to have you among us and looking forward to getting to know you.

Best wishes,
Capulet

[feralcat]

Thank you so much.

[missfrier]

Hi feralcat    welcome. A/S. We are all here for you and right. Behind you. Your not alone in Ur journey please lean on us for. Support 

[goldraindrops]

Dear @feralcat,

It was brave of you to reach out to us.  I'm sorry for the suffering that brought you here, but I can assure you you've found and kind and supportive community.  Many of us know about what you mentioned - suffering in silence and thinking we are alone.  

We are all here to listen to and support each other.  

Wishing you peace and healing,

Gold Raindrops

[Struggling88]

Hi, feralcat, and welcome! 

[MeBeMary]

On 6/14/2019 at 7:46 PM, feralcat said:

Hi, I've just recently found After Silence, I wish I had found you folks years ago. You all have such courage and wisdom. I've kept my trauma and its dark aftermath pretty much to myself for so long I don't really even have words to talk about it. Just pain and alone-ness.  I'm hoping if I can experience some understanding and support from other survivors I can make progress healing. And become part of a caring group and support other people on their healing journeys.

Hi feralcat,

Welcome to AS. I am very sorry for the trauma you endured and have reason to be here. I too, found this site after a great deal of time and thought the same thing. Dealing with trauma on your own can be very difficult. Here, at AS...you are not alone. It takes courage to reach out. I wish you many more forward steps on this healing journey.

Mary

 

[feralcat]

Thank you all so much for your kind welcomes. I'm so relieved to have found a safe caring group where I can really deal with trauma.

 

[2Siamese]

Hi there @feralcat  While your screen name caught my eye and garnered a smile, I want to extend one back to you as well with a warm welcome.  It's never easy being new and for the reasons you were guided here.  For that I am deeply sorry and trauma... just saying it can be a bit of relief.  Brave on your part!  You'll find a tremendous group of members and moderators to help you investigate your healing journey.

[Minerba]

Hello feralcat, how are you today? Welcome to After Silence. 

I am so sorry you experienced abuse. It was not your fault. It is normal to feel the way you are feeling. I hope you will find in this group the support you deserve. 

I wonder if you have a support network? Family members? friends? 

Take care. 

[feralcat]

Thank you all for your good thoughts and healing wishes. I wish them back to you and to everyone here and to the people who haven't found After Silence yet...

I don't have much of a support network but I am fortunate to have an amazing friend who knows a little, she knows I experienced trauma but doesn't know any details.

I also do have a wonderful caring therapist who has helped me thru years of relentless depression. I had told him I had experienced trauma but hadn't given any details until recently. It's so hard to talk about. Immediately after it happened i did talk about it with hospital staff and an advocate and way too many police, and then I was briefly in a rape survivors group... I think I convinced myself that that was enough and Poof! All healed... (I wish)  I also confided a lot in my best friend at the time, who is now deceased.

Part of me knows that I need to deal more with the trauma to be healthier and happier. It is a hellish rollercoaster when things get stirred up. But another part of me wants to keep this a secret, keep it contained, in a giant strong box with tons of locks on it. It is such a big horrible disgusting sadistic storm cloud. How can I let it out in the world? I really don't want it to touch anyone else's life, even secondhand or thirdhand. I feel like Pandora trying to keep evil stuffed in a box....