Winnifred

newbee :)

13 posts in this topic

hi im new on here! I hope everyone is having a nice day :) My friend suggested i try this as i find it pretty difficult to talk to people about what happened. Only a couple of people actually know what happened. Last year just before my 16th bday three men attacked me, they were drunk so probably don't even remember doing it. I have been finding it really hard to talk about what happened so i hope that AS can help me move on and actually come to terms to what they did to me. I thought it was behind me as afterwards i just didn't think about it and i refused to acknowledge it. Is that normal? But i guess recently i cant stop thinking about it and its really messing with my head. 

Thanks :) 

Winn

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Hi @Winnifred welcome to AS. I'm sorry for what you've gone through to bring you here but glad that you've found it.

It's completely normal that you tried to put what happened behind you and not think about it, I know I did the same during my abuse and have heard of many others doing the same too. It's also normal that you can't get it out of your head. I think these things effect us a lot whether we want to acknowledge it or not and from what I understand, it's only through dealing with it that we'll be able to heal. But 'dealing with it' is not by any means easy or straightforward and is a different process for everyone.

I personally tried to ignore my abuse for many years. I kept having problems with my mental health and ended up in hospital a number of times. It wasn't until I acknowledged that the abuse was having an impact on my life and I started talking about it with a therapist, that some of my problems started to become more manageable.

I hope that you find what you need here :flowers:

Edited by Sandpiper

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3 hours ago, Winnifred said:

hi im new on here! I hope everyone is having a nice day :) My friend suggested i try this as i find it pretty difficult to talk to people about what happened. Only a couple of people actually know what happened. Last year just before my 16th bday three men attacked me, they were drunk so probably don't even remember doing it. I have been finding it really hard to talk about what happened so i hope that AS can help me move on and actually come to terms to what they did to me. I thought it was behind me as afterwards i just didn't think about it and i refused to acknowledge it. Is that normal? But i guess recently i cant stop thinking about it and its really messing with my head. 

Thanks :) 

Winn

Hi Winn,

Welcome to AS. I am very sorry for the trauma you endured. Nobody had that right to hurt you as they did. You have found a very supportive site tho, with many understanding and kind members. You are not alone in your struggles, and unfortunately struggling is normal. You are doing good, reaching out, it is very courageous. Many of us go into denial, and sometimes it takes many years to face it. The fact they were drunk is no excuse...there is never an excuse that justifies these types of actions. You are not alone. I wish you the best on your healing journey.

Mary

:notalone: 

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I am so sorry this happened to you and so close to a special day. You have a great friend for referring you to this site, I'm glad you found it. Like they said it's normal to come to terms with it after some time. I'm just starting to come to terms with what happened four years ago and last year. So many safe hugs. Do you see a therapist? It has helped with processing everything and I've only had four sessions with this good one I've found. So many safe hugs, @Winnifred

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Hi, Winnifred, and welcome! :wave:

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7 hours ago, Winnifred said:

hi im new on here! I hope everyone is having a nice day :) My friend suggested i try this as i find it pretty difficult to talk to people about what happened. Only a couple of people actually know what happened. Last year just before my 16th bday three men attacked me, they were drunk so probably don't even remember doing it. I have been finding it really hard to talk about what happened so i hope that AS can help me move on and actually come to terms to what they did to me. I thought it was behind me as afterwards i just didn't think about it and i refused to acknowledge it. Is that normal? But i guess recently i cant stop thinking about it and its really messing with my head. 

Thanks :) 

Winn

Welcome to AS!  I'm sorry for the trauma you endured.  They had no right to hurt you the way they did.  Denial is normal many of have been there.  Talking about what had happened is very difficult just take your time. There is no rush. Say as much or as little as you like. You've found a very supportive site and many can relate as well.  Best wishes on your healing journey. 

PB

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Hi Winn,

welcome to AS, it is a supportive place, and sometimes it's easier to talk with people here than in 'real life' because we understand what you are going through. I was also assaulted at 15, and like you I didn't acknowledge it, in fact I buried it for a long time and I think that is quite common for survivors, it's just a way of surviving it.  I am sorry that it's messing with your head right now, that is unfortunately normal too... it is hard when it first really hits you and you start trying to process it, but if you are supported it can get easier over time.  I'm glad you are reaching out, it takes a lot of courage. What happened to you was a horrible crime and their being drunk is absolutely no excuse.

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HI Winn, I am sorry what you have gone through. No one should ever hurt anyone. You will find support here.

Patricia

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:aswelcomesu: :youcanheal: :notalone: :bighug:

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Hi @Winnifred welcome to AS. Like others said, drunk or not, no one had the right to assault you! Whether or not they remember what they did does not erase the fact that they did it. I am so sorry. It is normal to 'bury' it for some time so you can continue to function. When things start to settle, it comes back up, almost like an obsession. This is also normal. I am glad you joined. I hope you are in touch with a rape crisis center or an equivalent to help you work through things. Hoping the best for you as you heal from this.

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Welcome @Winnifred, sorry you have been though all of that. Your friend was right this is a good place to start talking this site if full of positive and supportive people to help you through your healing journey.

One

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hi @Winnifred welcome to After Silence,  I hope you are finding your way around the board okay. 

take care

Paula :aswelcomesu::youcanheal:

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Hi @Winnifred ! Welcome to AS! Sorry for the trauma you have gone through. I hope you'll browse around AS. The people here are very supportive and helpful. It's a safe place. Safe hugs if ok :hug:

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