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[Seagoat]

Hi everyone,

I was molested just one time at about 5 by an aqquaintance. I mostly blocked it out til now.  It didn't feel scary while it was happening so I didn't realize it was abuse until now.  Well my kids are getting to be the age I was so I couldn't ignore it anymore. At least now I know why I probably have all these problems despite being very fortunate in life. 

 I finally felt ready to try therapy now. I'm dissociating Most of the time ever since I started.  I also just don't feel upset at all about the incident so I don't know why I'm feeling bad all of a sudden. I really feel more upset about the various sexist incidents and some other sexual harassment I've experienced since then. I guess the feelings are all tied together. 

Looks like a great forum, I'm grateful it is here for us! I really need something to get me through until the next therapy session. It's really seeming like I would have been better off not opening this can of worms at all at the moment. But it's too late now! So here I am. 

Edited March 12, 2017 by Seagoat

[howlieowl]

welcome @Seagoat. im very sorry for what has happened to you and your reason for being here. there are wonderful people on here to provide tremendous support. i wish you much peace and happiness on your journey in healing.

[Jade4696]

Welcome @Seagoat 

[Painnbroken]

@Seagoat

Welcome to AS! I am so sorry for the trauma you've experienced.  You've come to a very supportive site.  Take your time look around say as much or as little.  Your not alone here, wasn't your fault and there is no judgement here.  Good luck with your healing journey. 

[MeBeMary]

Hi Seagoat,

Welcome to AS. I am very sorry for what you experienced. It is hard to process something like this at 5 years old, it may be the reason you did not feel scared at the time. Your adult mind may be conflicted, now that you have children of your own. You have found a very supportive site to help you thru some of the issues you have been facing. I do wish yo well on this journey.

Mary

[patriciag]

21 hours ago, Seagoat said:

Hi everyone,

I was molested just one time at about 5 by an aqquaintance. I mostly blocked it out til now.  It didn't feel scary while it was happening so I didn't realize it was abuse until now.  Well my kids are getting to be the age I was so I couldn't ignore it anymore. At least now I know why I probably have all these problems despite being very fortunate in life. 

 I finally felt ready to try therapy now. I'm dissociating Most of the time ever since I started.  I also just don't feel upset at all about the incident so I don't know why I'm feeling bad all of a sudden. I really feel more upset about the various sexist incidents and some other sexual harassment I've experienced since then. I guess the feelings are all tied together. 

Looks like a great forum, I'm grateful it is here for us! I really need something to get me through until the next therapy session. It's really seeming like I would have been better off not opening this can of worms at all at the moment. But it's too late now! So here I am. 

Hi Seagoat and welcome to AS. I was CSA ( child sexually abuse) started around the age of 4. I was triggered a lot when my girls were around the same age too. For me I could talk about what happened ( many years later)  But I had no emotion to it , I am now learning to deal the emotion and as my T says Patricia emotions are messy and you don't like mess.

You will find lots of support here, for me the biggest thing I wasn't alone. We are here to support you.

Patricia

[Struggling88]

Hi, Seagoat, and welcome! 

[phoenixxx]

Welcome to AS, Seagoat. I am sorry for what happened to you as a child. One time is one too many. I can relate to not really being able to connect any feelings with the bad events, but struggling nevertheless. It is a defence mechanism. Hope you find AS helpful. You have our support. 

[reglois]

    if ok