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Ian37

Reaching Out

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Hi, everyone. I hope this finds everyone having a great day so far. Just wanted to reach out and say a quick hello. May share my story later on. I am definitely a survivor of abuse. However, I also have blocked a lot out. My hope is to perhaps help others going through specific traumas. There is a sense of comfort in knowing you're not alone.

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Hi Ian,

Welcome to AS. I am very sorry that you have experienced abuse, but you have found a very supportive site. Take your time and look around. There is no rush. Many survivors are like you and do not have all the memories, but I know the effect is still there. I do wish you well as you walk down your path of healing.

Mary

:supportu: 

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Thank you so much for the warm welcome, MeBeMary! This already seems like a very supportive group. I am grateful for coming across the site. The path will not be the easiest one. I tend to be one who is more anxious to help rather than someone able and willing to receive it my own self. I am finally ready to take that challenge.

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Hi Ian welcome to AS, I am sorry for the abuse that you went through. As Mary has said you will find this to be a very supportive site. You are like many of here supporting others and not ourselves. Remember you are not alone here.

Patricia

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Welcome Ian! I know the start can be difficult, and sometimes it is easier to give rather than receive help, but in my experience helping others is also helping ourselves. For me just being here and reading other people's experiences, replying to other people's posts etc, has been helpful. I don't post very often myself. Anyway, hope you have the same experience of feeling supported and that you get sth out of this, even if you choose to share little and are more comfortable helping others. You're not alone here! 

Edited by phoenixxx
typo

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Thank you for the kind welcomes, Patricia, Phoenixxx and Reglois! Phoenixxx, your encouraging words could not be more truthful. Perhaps, one of the reasons I tend to offer help and support to others first is because of feeling inadequate and unworthy for so long as a result of past trauma. Maybe, it is through wanting to help which offers me a specific sense of possible validation. Then again, I feel that my social awkwardness and inconsistent maturity have always tended to both hold myself back and accidently hurt those around me. Leading to nothing more than an increase in general pain. Not sure if any of that even makes sense. It is the best I can do for now.

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4 hours ago, Ian37 said:

Thank you for the kind welcomes, Patricia, Phoenixxx and Reglois! Phoenixxx, your encouraging words could not be more truthful. Perhaps, one of the reasons I tend to offer help and support to others first is because of feeling inadequate and unworthy for so long as a result of past trauma. Maybe, it is through wanting to help which offers me a specific sense of possible validation. Then again, I feel that my social awkwardness and inconsistent maturity have always tended to both hold myself back and accidently hurt those around me. Leading to nothing more than an increase in general pain. Not sure if any of that even makes sense. It is the best I can do for now.

:) I think I got you. And I think you got it spot on with the validation. Don't worry about being socially awkward here. I can be too (at least I feel I am sometimes) but I think as long as you are open and honest, people will forgive you if sth doesn't come across quite like you meant it. 

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I appreciate the welcome, Struggling88! Thanks for that added encouragement, Phoenixxx! Perhaps, all of us feel sort of socially awkward at times. Maybe, some of us are better at trying to hide it. Open honesty is something I am trying to get better at. With the kind help of those closest to me. Being around those who were once closed-off and dishonest tended to stall my own progress. Trust has been a huge issue for me. It, or specifically the lack of it, has led me to make many mistakes. I wonder if and how others on here have learned to trust again. Something which will perhaps be explored in time. Still, better late than never, I suppose.

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Welcome, Ian37. I take it you are a soccer fan? I love it, I also enjoy watching soccer. I am sorry for what brought you to AS but I am glad you are finding it to be a welcoming environment so far.

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Hi, Me89! Guilty as charged, huge soccer fan on this end. Have coached, played, and watched for many years. Thank you for the kind words! Everyone on here has been beyond friendly so far.

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hello Ian

welcome to After Silence

I hope you are finding your way around the board okay, if you need any help, please don't hesitate to contact me or any member of the team

take care

Paula :aswelcomesu:

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Thank you, Paula! Definitely finding my way around and so grateful to have come across such a supportive community. My hope and plan is to continue being just a small part. There is true strength through general unity.

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Welcome to AS Ian37....you are not alone here there are many supportive people on this site.

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Thank you for the welcome, PreciousRose! That is really kind of you. Many supportive people, indeed.

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@Ian37

hey Ian

i apologize for the delay but wanted to say welcome to AS!  You will find great support from everyone and there is no judgement at all.   Oh awesome Soccer!  Love Soccer!  

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Thank you so much, Painbroken! A kind welcome like that is not ever late at all. This is an amazing group of human beings and I am so happy to be just a small part of it. Such a shame that soccer is not more popular here in the States. Looking forward to interacting with you hopefully on the boards!

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@Ian37

youre very welcome!  I miss playing Soccer. I played for for a traveling team and played in college as well and coached for 5 yrs. it's a great sport and you're right.  Have a good day! :)

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