Jump to content
SociallyAwkward

Lost in more senses then one....

Recommended Posts

Hi..... I'm a survivor. I guess..... I read everyone else's posts and look to myself like I'm some kind of wuss. Finding myself in a place like this when I wasn't actually abused like most of you.

Made a few posts in the male support area. Trying to get to know people that might understand. Some female members out there might also have a similar experience. Molesters tend to use the same classic tactics.... They all do it slightly different but it's still exactly the same.

My molester was an older boy and he tricked me into thinking it was a game, which at the time I enjoyed and even asked to play again the following night.

i define myself as a straight man. It's humiliating admitting I was a willing participant in my molestation. 

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Hi Socially Awkward. Welcome to After Silence. I'm so sorry for what has happened to you. I know you are going through struggles internally, and I saw that you mentioned you were "ashamed" or yourself at that age.

You were taken advantage of. Everyone here has had different experiences, different people, different types of assault...but we all dealt with it.

So did/are you. You were a child when this happened, this was not your fault and you shouldn't blame yourself. I know you said you "enjoyed it" but honestly you couldn't have know what it meant.

 

When I was 8 years old, I thought women got pregnant from sitting on a toilet seat that a boy peed on, So at school when I would use the restroom I was afraid I was pregnant. That was my view on things, and even then you were younger than that. There was absolutely no way you would have know what was happening was wrong. Adults (people older than you) can make horrible things seem the way they want it to (fun, happy, exciting). Younger children aren't experienced enough to know truth from lie, right from wrong, and tricks from reality.

I'm so glad that you decided to become a member of AS. We are all here supporting you.

And nothing that happened to you should make you feel like a "wuss". We don't categorize what happened to us by the severity or the situation. We only focus on ourselves now and our recovery.

You can message me if you ever want to talk.

:butterfly: Terra

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Hello SociallyAwkward,

Welcome to AS. I am very sorry for the trauma you have suffered. You were a child and tho you did not understand at the time, it was wrong for anyone to do this to you. Even if at the time you thought it was a game.  You are still suffering from the events that happened back then, otherwise you wouldn't be here now. You are not a wuss, and I even don't believe you were a willing participant. Being manipulated is not the same as being a willing participant. Manipulation is a big part of how many of us have been victimized, as children and as adults.  You may see many differences, but I see many similarities with myself and others on this site. I wish you the best on your healing journey.

Mary

:supportu:

 

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
4 hours ago, SociallyAwkward said:

Hi..... I'm a survivor. I guess..... I read everyone else's posts and look to myself like I'm some kind of wuss. Finding myself in a place like this when I wasn't actually abused like most of you.

Made a few posts in the male support area. Trying to get to know people that might understand. Some female members out there might also have a similar experience. Molesters tend to use the same classic tactics.... They all do it slightly different but it's still exactly the same.

My molester was an older boy and he tricked me into thinking it was a game, which at the time I enjoyed and even asked to play again the following night.

i define myself as a straight man. It's humiliating admitting I was a willing participant in my molestation. 

Hello Socially Awkward. Welcome to AS! It is my wish that you find this site as helpful and healing as I have in my own healing journey.

I am part of the NST (Newbie Support Team). What that means is that I can help direct you as you learn to navigate the forums. Should you have any questions at all feel free to send a PM to me and I will help you out. :)

You've taken a huge step in reaching out. This is a big step in healing from abuse of any kind. Take all the time you need to share. Feel free to share as little or as much as you would like to. Some people find it better or easier for them if they "transition" into the forums by doing things such as: not typing right away but rather just reading other user's threads/topics and/or replying to them, or by just reading threads and seeing what we've got to offer, but then again others like to just jump right in and share their story. That is what is great about this place, it's all up to you and you make the calls. Many of us have had our control and rights taken from us, here YOU ARE IN CONTROL. :flowers:

Know that you are not alone.

Oh also please try not to compare. The worst thing that's happened to you is the worst thing that happened to you. We all have different stories and walks of life. Comparing only invalidates your experience and causes others to feel bad about their experiences. So please know that your story is heard and matters. You will find support here.

Am listening and validating you and your experiences.

Sending healing energy your way.

~Chantel~ :flowers:

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

No matter what we have been through many of us have similar after effects. I'm sure you will find the people here very supportive and understanding. There are no judgements here. I'm glad you are seeking support. Welcome to AS :notalone:

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Thank you all for the warm welcome..... It's slightly unsettling knowing my story is a click away, but i truly appreciate the positive energy of this site. I don't really want to get into the full story of what happened ( the nature of the game. The way he treated me. The things he did.....) but one day I'll write it. When I'm more comfortable with this little corner of the internet.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Join the conversation

You can post now and register later. If you have an account, sign in now to post with your account.

Guest
Reply to this topic...

×   Pasted as rich text.   Paste as plain text instead

  Only 75 emoji are allowed.

×   Your link has been automatically embedded.   Display as a link instead

×   Your previous content has been restored.   Clear editor

×   You cannot paste images directly. Upload or insert images from URL.


×
×
  • Create New...