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New and scared


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I'm very new to asking for help. Today I saw a victim advocate.  I waited months to even say anything.  Half from fear, part from shame, and humiliation and shock. I was offered counselling and group therapy.  I'm terrified and don't know what to expect. I don't know how to talk about what happened without falling back to poor coping mechanisms. What can I expect? Does the fear go away? 

I don't know if this is the right place to post so I'm sorry if it isn't. 

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Hi bridgesandrain,

Welcome to AS. I am very sorry for the trauma you have suffered. It was not your fault. Nobody deserves to be hurt like you were. You have found a very supportive site with many understanding and kind members. It was very new to me, asking for help, before I came here. It's not easy, I know. I didn't say anything for over 30 years. The important thing is you have taken a step. It's not easy, but pretending isn't easy either, is it?  The most important thing that I've learned here is that I am not alone. You are not alone, either. This community will support you as you try to figure out these things. I wish you well on your healing journey.

Mary

:notalone:

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Hi Bridge, welcome to AS, as Mary said we all have felt the way you do right now. This is a good and safe place. Yes the fear goes away but it is process and you don't have to do it alone.

Patricia

Edited by patriciag
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Bridges.  I was molested and raped continually by a relative as a child after over 50 years, I still find it hard to talk about it.  I still haven't put it on paper. Only in the past two years have I really tried to repair myself. You have taken the first step.  You would be surprised how many of your friends and acqaintences  have been through it and are trying to deal with it too. Counselling is a great way to deal with it. Let people know. Let the power of your abuser go and take back your life.  In the end is helps you to become whole again.

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14 hours ago, bridgesandrain said:

I'm very new to asking for help. Today I saw a victim advocate.  I waited months to even say anything.  Half from fear, part from shame, and humiliation and shock. I was offered counselling and group therapy.  I'm terrified and don't know what to expect. I don't know how to talk about what happened without falling back to poor coping mechanisms. What can I expect? Does the fear go away? 

I don't know if this is the right place to post so I'm sorry if it isn't. 

Hello Bridges. Welcome to AS! It is my wish that you find this site as helpful and healing as I have in my healing journey. 

I am part of the NST (Newbie Support Team). What that means is that I (or any of the mods/admins/NST) can help/direct you as you learn how to use the forums. Should you have questions, feel free to send a PM to any one of the AS staff. 

You've taken a huge step in reaching out. This is a big step in healing from abuse of any kind. Take all the time you need in sharing. 

Know that you are not alone. 

Am listening and validating you and your experiences. 

Here is a link to the board guidelines and rules: 
http://www.aftersilence.org/forum/index.php?s=5c8b6bf0f3f95bcc2f076d1d105a1719&showtopic=194#entry685

Here is a link regarding some privacy/safety issues that are helpful:
http://www.aftersilence.org/forum/index.php?s=5c8b6bf0f3f95bcc2f076d1d105a1719&showtopic=27269#entry218846

Sending healing energy your way. 

~Chantel~ :flowers:

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Thank you so much for the warm welcome and responses.  I do have things to process out loud but I'm still working on getting there. It all feels very surreal. For now, I will work on navigating around here.  Are all sections of the forum public?

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Hello bridgesandrain! I hope that you are doing well today! I'm glad that you decided to become part of After Silence. We are all here to support one another. If you need any help or you just want to talk you can always message me!

 

I'm a moderator for several sections on After Silence and no not everything is public. You need to post a few times (10) before you can access the "Share your Section" forum. And if you want to be a member of the "Female Survivors" I can message you the password.

:butterfly: Terra

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