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Posting anything at all on this forum is a real step for me. For a long time, I both did and did not know what happened to me. I had all of the facts and memories. At no point did I forget or repress memories. I just didn't allow myself to think through what it all meant and name it. For nearly 20 years after the fact, I never let myself say "I am someone who was molested". I guess because if I did that, it would be real, and I would have to confront it, and let it be a part of me and my story. I didn't know if I could do that without coming apart.

But all of a sudden, I found myself putting the pieces together and admitting to what I've known this whole time: I am someone who was molested. And there's all kind of feelings and fears I'm confronting head on, and so I'm here, and I don't plan on coming apart, and I'm glad to meet all of you.

Edited by sixofswords
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Hello sixofswords,

Welcome to AS. I am also new here and have just found my voice to post about what happened to me. I understand what you are saying, for a long time I could only admit that I was “touched”. “Touched” had no face, no definition…I kept the memories hidden in plain sight, but refused to know what really happened. When it all burst, I ba=egan having more memories than I ever wanted to face. I hope that y our healing journey remains in calm strength.


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I can understand how hard it is to talk about it -even writing but writing it can be better at first because it gets it out of your brain and on paper and your not thinking about it a lot.


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Hello and welcome to AS, My name is Paula and I am one of the newbie support team here. If you need any help getting around the board, please contact me.

take care, Paula

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  • 4 months later...


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