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Found 4 results

  1. Leia Skywalker

    College

    I thought that I could escape this, escape being a victim of sexual assault and abuse, but it never feels like I can. There are seminars about assault, they are required and important but every time I listen I feel trapped and diminished. These seminars paint assault and abuse as something that can be easy to diagnose, and all you need is good friends. I can't even think, my mind goes dark and I slip into the spiral of my mind. "Did my friends just think I deserve it?" "Did I just want it" "Why didn't I just say no?" First off, no they don't, no you didn't you were
  2. I had to fly recently, which I hate but it wasn't until I was on the plane when I realized the main problem. I would have a layover in a state that I had never been to but my abuser lived in. I knew that it wouldn't happen, but even the .0001% chance was too much for me. I wanted to leave as soon as we could and never come back to this place. Being close was too much, it feels ridiculous that just being in the same state as him again was enough to send me spiraling but it was. I was a wreck, and I couldn't tell anyone. I was traveling with a group, a group who doesn't know my story o
  3. I Saw him today. Not the bad one but the second one. My second ex and my second abuser. I saw him and all I wanted to do was cry and scream. I didn’t say anything. I just ran. Talking about them and what they did is hard, but seeing them. That’s inpossible. When I see him, all I see is who I was and how that girl that I once was is gone. The little girl who was comfortable and safe, she isn’t around anymore. I cant even bring myself to talk to them and let them know how I feel. But what good would it do. Would they listen? Would they care? Or is
  4. *Trigger warning - this very lengthy post discusses some of my broken up/fragmented memories and behaviors as a child. No actual CSA details are shared, simply because I can’t remember any. But some of these memories may be triggersome and I ask you all to please take gentle care while proceeding. Today, I want to talk about something called validation. Or the lack of, when it’s otherwise referred to as its counterpart - invalidation. This is a term known all too well by survivors of sexual abuse and the many ugly forms it takes. Validation is somethi
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