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Found 7 results

  1. How do you explain to someone that you don't want attention? You don't want the award, you just want to keep working. My whole life has been filled with moments where I should have just sat down and taken pride and what I accomplished, but I learned to keep moving. Attention brought to me was bad, because that meant I was seen I don't want to be seen I just want to keep going. That's what he taught me. Not to take pride in what I earned because I didn't really earn it, or if people saw me then they would see what happened. What they did to me. Which is even worse. But
  2. yanna

    finally telling

    When I was 6 years old my older sister started to molest me, she use to call it "the game", it lasted for about another year or two, at least until she got a new boyfriend, then she no longer "needed me". By the time I was 7, my older cousin who was a female as well also started to molest me, saying everything we did was for fun and that everyone did it. Around that same time, my god sister who was around my age decided she wanted to play the game as well, she had learned it from our uncle. I didn't understand what was going on or that it was wrong. Through out the years, I had other encounter
  3. yanna

    empty

    Sometimes I can go months doing well or at least being able to fake it. But then it randomly gets harder. I feel like i can't breath, I'm suffocating and I don't know what to do. People notice I act differently but no one ever asks. They see the scars but more their eyes past them quickly, pretending as if they never saw. Some of my friends know, but we also don't talk about it, they know why I act the way I do sometimes, but sometimes they forget and don't understand why my mood changes or why I don't like being touched. I'm going home this weekend, no one understands why I never look f
  4. This Christmas 2015, with a beautiful full moon and quiet consuming victory, will be burned into my memory for eternity. My healing goals include fulfilling my family karma and ending the inherent chain of abuse. To successfully achieve this goal I must slay multiple demons that thrive upon sucking my soul into their fiery bellies only to regurgitate sabotage and betrayal. This week alone I have slayed multitudes of the blood thirsty beasts crouched in venomous fury awaiting my next breath and calculated action. The demons I speak of dwell in the hearts of my poor family. Their device is to ke
  5. Dreamer90

    Me Vs. Me

    This is my first entry. I hardly come here; I always have the same unanswered questions. Perhaps they are only ones I can figure out myself? I've come to the point where I'm seriously questioning talking to my mom. We've butted heads through the years as a result of my experiences. You see, when things got tough, and I was involved in things beyond my control, I alienated my family. I was a young teenager at the time, and thought I was protecting them. At the time, there really were no other options, and I have come to terms with that. I've stopped saying "I should have...". So what now? Some
  6. Hi, I'm newbeginnings21. I was attacked on Aug 31, 2013 and after weeks of dark and despair and loneliness, decided to seek out some support and love from other survivors.This is my first day posting and having full access here. I have posted a lot since i've had so much pent up, but I just want to say thank you to everyone who has replied, messaged me, and talked to me in chat. I feel so welcome and like I'm not just a random poster who will never have her stories read. You guys are awesome. Thank you.
  7. VintageCrayon

    Daddy

    I used to race to the front door when I'd hear you come home, I would greet you excitedly with a hug and a smile I was daddy's little girl, it didn't take much to make you proud - Nor did it take much to make you angry and hostile. As I grew older it was much more of a challenge, Making you proud and appeasing you were a definition combined. I appeased you one moment, then suddenly disappointed, And proud again the next moment in your shifty state of mind. Unpredictably temperamental and distant you became, Tensions growing stronge
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