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Everything posted by John

  1. Hey Stephanie, Firstly I wanna say welcome, and I just wanted to let you know I'm really looking forward to having you apart of our AS family, I am sure you'll add alot to our group (our family) Secondly, I just wanted to say I really like you avitar picture, from the word go it stood out to me, and I just wanted to compliment you on that because it looks really warm and comforting, and also I do love coffee And last but not least, please know if you ever need help, or just someone to talk to, feel free to PM me, (or Lynn - she's lovely) because we're here to help s John
  2. John


    Hey LadyAlix, Welcome to AfterSilence - I'm sorry for what has brought you here, but I'm very glad you've come here, because the survivors (like yourself) here , are so supportive and understanding, and for me personally it's been a godsend to have people who understand what we've been through so I'm so glad you've decided to be apart of our community John
  3. Hey John, Welcome to AfterSilence, I'm a male member here also, and I also share your name I'm also a member of the Newbie Support Team here at AS, and I'm here to help ensure you feel at home here at AS, and answer any questions you've got I can understand what you mean to a degree about talking about things to girls, I've talked to both guys and girls about my abuse, and I've had instances where both have been supportive, however often I do feel more comfortable talking with girls also, but in saying that, their are some things I feel alot more comfortable talking about with guys, which brings me to say, if you ever do need a guy to talk to, you've only gotta PM me Take gentle care of youself, John
  4. When replying to posts, you should see an icon looking similar to this one by clicking this it will allow you to enter the emotions menu where you can select which emotions you want to add to your posts. I hope this helps John
  5. Hey Hannah, Welcome to AfterSilence, I'm glad you've come here, and I hope that you can find the healing and support you need here at AS, if you need any assistance using the message board please do PM myself, Lynn who you've already met, or any Newbie Support Team member for help, we're here to help John
  6. Hey there, Welcome to AfterSilence - Sorry I think your name went right over my head Anyhoo, I'm John a Newbie Support Team member here at AS, and I just wanted to welcome you to AfterSilence and I look forward to having you here and I hope you find the support and healing you need here. This place I've found is very supportive and understanding
  7. Hey 4Pixie, We're glad that you've come here, and glad that you're wanting to connect with other people who have had similar experiences to you own, you've certainly come to the right place for that I'm looking forward to having you here at AS, and I hope you find the support and friendship here to assist in your healing journey Please do take gentle care, John
  8. Wow Kelly you've been here for so long, it must be amazing seeing the board "grow up" in a sense, even since I've joined it's grown so much, but since you've joined the transformation must be amazing!
  9. Hey Laura, When I joined AfterSilence I would have said exactly same thing as you, however please know over time and healing here at AS, it does get better and you find yourself being in a better place within yourself and feeling better, overcoming what happened, and moving forward with your life. If you ever want someone to talk to please feel free to PM me, I'm here to offer what support I can John
  10. John


    Hey erinoutthere, I'm sorry for what you experienced last friday but I am glad you've decided to reach out here, because the people here really do understand and care, and I hope we can help you in healing from what you've experienced and move on with you life John
  11. These are some interesting questions you've got there Does it help your healing? Certainly, when I think about what makes me tick, and what turns me on, it's the satisfaction I get from helping Newbie members become apart of this wonderful community. Give you a sense of satisfaction that you're helping people? It does, especially when I get PM's from members saying I've helped them, it really does make me get that warm fuzzy feeling inside, it's a awesome sence of satisfaction. Conflict you because you think you ought to be an example of someone who has already healed? To be honest, not really, it's not a requirement to be healed to become a staff member, I know I've still got a long way to go, to be honest, actually it motivates me more to heal so I can focus less on my own healing, and focus more on doing my best to help others in their healing Do you sometimes feel helpless to help? I think everyone can feel helpless, not just staff members who feel helpful, I've talked to many members here who also feel helpless also, I think when you interact with others who are in very difficult circumstances in their lives, or who are having a very hard time, then we can all feel quite helpless. I think though we all need to manage those helpless feeling and try not to let them consume us, so we can keep a clear head and as a result be as affective as possible in the comforting we give to people. I don't think this is just for staff members but everyone But of course like everyone else, I do feel helpless from time to time, but in saying that, I do try and keep obtimisim to that maximum. Does it help or is it difficult in any other way? I just love it, for me, wanting to eventually be a psychologist and working towards that (slowly - 8 year double degree - yeah I couldn't help myself had to take the double ) in my studies, I think the job description of a psychologist is helping people (well that'll be my job description anyways) and the fact that I can already give atleast some help to people here on AS really give me a buzz, it's awesome. I've got abit of a question for you, I was just wondering why you're interest? I certainly don't have a problem with you asking, quiet the opposite actually, I'm glad you asked , I'm actually just curious or maybe you where just curious? John
  12. John


    Hey there If you're looking for friendship you've come to a very welcoming place - I'm glad you've come here If you're looking for a friend then please know all you got to do is send me a PM John
  13. I agree with it being a good idea, I think secondaries, like survivors, have their own set of issues which only other secondaries could understand, so having a dedicated area just for them sounds like a great idea - much like us survivors have our own areas John
  14. Hey SnowWhitefairy, Welcome to Aftersilence - it's ok to be nervious, it takes a little while for them to settle down and I am sure you will settle into AS just fine - this is a very supportive place Take gentle care John
  15. Hey a.e.g. One thing is for sure you've come to the right place to share and to have people listen to what you have to say, AS is a wonderfully supportive place where survivors just like yourself come and share their like experiences with each other, and through doing this gain some healing, and I hope this is also something you can find here at AS John
  16. John


    Hey tucker, I'm glad that you've come here, and are feeling this is where you need to be, this is a very supportive place where many people come and as they gain confidence they share, and then from that they gain some healing I am looking forward to seeing you here at AS, and look forward to seeing you grow and heal here Aftersilence
  17. John

    Hi ^^

    Hey esyntha, I have a learning disability myself which I have been able to overcome with the help of some very good university professors, but I can relate to you in terms of knowing what it's like to have a disability ... I just wanted to say welcome to AfterSilence and please know that this place is very understanding and supportive and we're here to help you, and to share our healing journeys with you so please come here when you need abit of understanding from fellow survivors John
  18. John

    Hi All

    Hey there, I'm glad you've decided to speak up on AfterSilence because the more voice we can get to break the silence the better .. I'm sorry you've gone through this pain, and I hope that you can get some support and understanding here at AS, I am sure you will, this is such an understanding website, and I look forward to seeing you here John
  19. Hey Tawny, I don't know if you remember me from last time but I would've been around here somewhere, anyhoo, I'm really glad to see an older member from AS, who's been here before return to the community, it's great to see, and I hope to see you around AS from here on out Take gentle care of yourself John
  20. Hey there, I am sorry for what has happened in your childhood, it's very wrong, and you shouldv'e never hard to go through, I am also a childhood sexual abuse survivor, and I know it hurts so much, but please know I do believe in you and your ability to heal, and please remember that now you're apart of AS, we're here to support you though your survivor road I look forward to seeing you here at AS John
  21. John


    Hey JADA I'm John - I'm abit younger then you at 18, but we're both survivors so I know we share a common bond - at first when you join I know it can be abit hard to know what to say but I am sure you'll fit in here just fine and remember we're here to support you and give you validation through the hard time John
  22. John

    New Here

    Hey Caity, Welcome to AfterSilence - just say whatever feels right, we understand, it ok to say whatever feel natural to you and we'll be here to listen to you and validate you, this place is amazingly supportive and we'll be here to validated and support you in whatever you say Take gentle care of yourself John
  23. Hey there tb813, Welcome to AfterSilence - congradulatons on your little one on the way! By the sounds of things you've come along way to in your healing journey, and I am glad that you've joined AfterSilence as part of that journey. It's very uplifting to have a new member come here and be so advanced on their healing journey, and it's just wounderful the progress you've made, and how that's also strengthened the bond between you and your husband - I'm also glad to hear therapy has worked so well for you, from my own personal perspective, therapy has helped me so much also I look forward to see you here at AS, and I hope AS can help you to continue to move forward on your healing journey John
  24. Hey Flower I'm glad you've come to AfterSilence, quite often I'll put on the outer shell also, not let people see the inside, and want to push it all down forever and just put up that front, but here you don't have to do that, here you can let that facade down, and share those hurts, and we won't judge, we'll be here to support you and comfort you Thank-you for joing AfterSilence John
  25. Hey brokenangel35, I am very sorry for the hurt and frustration that you've been experiencing, but it makes me glad that you've come here to get some of those out here with fellow survivor here on AfterSilence Please know you're not alone in your hurt, we're here with you and please come to aftersilence when you need somewhere to just let others know what you're going throuhg and get the validation and support you deserve Take gentle care John
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