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blove

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Posts posted by blove

  1. 4 hours ago, MeBeMary said:

    Hi blove,

    Welcome to our community. I am very sorry for what happened to you as a child and the struggles that you face. They were undeserved and unfair. You have found a very supportive site with many understanding members. You are not alone.

    I agree how abuse can affect all areas of your life, even if you really don't acknowledge it. I am quite like you, memories are more vague an confusing from the young age, but there is to much to be dismissed as imagination or something like that. It is not likely you dreamed anything up, as this is the last thing anyone of us would dream up. Do not discard what you feel deep inside...even tho we never wished for it to happen in the first place.

    You will find so much support and understanding here. Our community has terrific members who can relate, if not by specific abuse, then the struggles you face. I personally find it better when you don't feel as alone...here, nobody is alone. So welcome aboard.

    I wish you the best on making forward steps as you continue this journey of healing.

    Mary

    :notalone:

    What has been your journey to understanding the abuse with vague memories? Is there anything that helped you accept it happened or work through it without clear memories? It's something I still wrestle with, though I believe deep down my father was sexually abusive. My older sister was the first one long ago to say my father abused her, but at the time I didn't believe it happened because I didn't have memories. But as I got older I started having dreams, I have PTSD and many other symptoms connected with sexual abuse. 

  2. Hi all. I am a survivor of childhood sexual abuse and incest as I was sexually abused by my father. It's been a long slow journey to the recognition that it happened and the path to healing. Over time I have been more open about being a survivor of abuse, so close people in my life know about it. The abuse has permeated every area of my life and negatively affected relationships with myself, family members, friends and my marriage. I was always too scared to face the abuse and thought I couldn't handle it until a life changing event happened that showed me my inner strength.

    I read how important it is to join community of other survivors. I struggle day to day and sometimes moment to moment to make sense of it all. I feel a lot of inner turmoil but don't show it to others. I often don't rely on others and don't want to burden people with my problems. I also struggle with the fact that I don't have clear memories of the abuse, which makes me second guess myself. I found a great therapist and I am slowly working through the book The Courage to Heal. What I do know is I want to heal and I am happy to be a part of this wonderful community.

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