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    Photography and Brazilian Jiu Jitsu.

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  1. Having a really rough day... I got triggered this morning, and I'm hormonal which makes everything 1000 times worse. Feeling like a waste of space today. I really wish I could turn this broken part of my brain off and just live a normal mentally balanced life. 

    1. BrightSide


       im sorry you have been triggered, you are really not a waste of space, sitting with you, if you would like? B

    2. MeBeMary


      Sitting with you and sending positive vibes and warm wishes for your struggles to easy.

      :hug: if ok.

    3. JME


      I really appreciate it, thank you both <3  

  2. If you guys could send some positive thoughts and vibes tomorrow that would be great! First therapy session in a very long time and I'm feeling very anxious about it. I'm going blank on why I even wanted to go in there first place? My brain is going into "you're fine, you don't need help" mode. Any tips? Should I write a list out or just go in and see how it goes? Also, is anyone else having feeling weird about virtual therapy? How do you make a space  a "safe space"? 

    ~ JME 

    1. Show previous comments  3 more
    2. Iheartcupcakes


      I like to make lists, so writing can be helpful. 

      I know...I prefer in person, as well. 

      A lot of times we do need help to heal. I know I do. Maybe your anxiety is causing your inner voice to say that. I know mine does. 

    3. JME


      I'm sure it's just my anxiety. I always feel like there is so much worse out there, I wouldn't want to take someone else's spot or waste this therapists time. But I'm sure it's just my anxiety, this is for me anyway, I shouldn't be concerned with wasting someone's time or not having enough crap going on to need help. Today will be what it is! I should just be grateful I was able to get in. Whatever happens happens. 

    4. JME


      Therapy went ok, but I left feeling very uneasy about some stuff. I posted about it in the Therapy forum. Feeling pretty scared, sad, and a bit confused right now. 😕

  3. Hi @ForeverRecovering I'm so sorry for whatever trauma has brought you here, but I'm glad you found us! There is a really great community and support system here that is so helpful, kind, supportive and encouraging. I hope AS can be a safe place to help you work through your traumas and to help you along through your healing process. ~ JME
  4. It's tough over here fam... Hubby and I haven't spoke in a few days. I've tried talking to him, ask him to say what's on his mind, tried casual conversation, but he is totally shut down with me because of my bad night the other day. He is offended because sometimes I don't want his help, I just want to talk and vent. He wants to fix things, and he can't fix these things for me, so he shut down and isn't speaking to me at all right now. (I posted in The Aftermath if you want to see what I'm talking about) Feeling really alone and I don't know what to do to help him or help myself right now...

    ~ J 

    *update, he thinks hes ruining my days because he doesnt ignore my shit. If I'm having a bad day he doesnt just leave it alone, he tries to help me through it, which usually ends up with us arguing. So hes done trying..* 

    1. Show previous comments  3 more
    2. Iheartcupcakes


      How are you today, J? I hope things are better. ❤️

    3. JME


      Thank you for checking in and asking! 

      I'm doing ok, hubby and I are on better terms and I have my first therapy session in years tomorrow. I'm feeling pretty anxious about it, not sure where to start or how to do therapy anymore, lol... It will be odd doing it virtually but anything is better than nothing at this point! 

      Thank you again so much for checking in, I really appreciate it @Iheartcupcakes ❤️ 


    4. Iheartcupcakes


      I am glad to hear that. I hope it helps. I have been in therapy for years and I don't know when I will be able to stop, truthfully. Nothing wrong with seeking help! ❤️

  5. I am so so sorry you're going through this, it's so hard having a parent that is going through health stuff. I've done the same with my friends and family, they all seem to be more like strangers these days. It is not pathetic to cry alone and I understand, we all need someone to sit with and just be in a moment with. Even if it's been a while and it's hard, maybe try reaching out to someone? I hope you find some peace and someone you trust that you can sit with
  6. Thank you for sharing, I'm so happy you are OK and for the growth you've found this year! I'm going to be checking out Psychology Today thanks to you! Thank you for the recommendation
  7. I have terrible social anxiety and hate meeting new people by myself, doesn't matter the situation, I always have crippling anxiety. But I've wanted to try and push myself to be better with this type of stuff. For the month of May I'm offering free photoshoots in my area to try and meet new people and step WAY out of my comfort zone (staying 6ft+ away at all times!). Today was the first of many, and it went so well. I'm so thankful and wanted to share. It's been a horrible week for me, so this was nice. ❤️ 

    1. MeBeMary


      I'm so happy you found a way to interact with people in a safe and creative way! I am sure many will like this free service you are offering. Glad the week is ending on a high note for you. :clap: 

  8. I'm really tired of dealing with my mental health and trying to balance a marriage. I keep apologizing for things I can't control, making promises I'll change things I can't control to try and make my husband happy. My husband is getting annoyed and frustrated with me for the things I can't change or control...I get it that this is hard and new for him too, he deals with his own mental health and now he has mine to deal with.
    I'm tired of feeling like I'm the problem all the time and feeling like I'm broken. I've been so good lately, positive, productive, calm and at peace and then my hormones messed me all up. Started feeling anxious, panic attacks, tried telling my husband so he would have an idea of where I was at. Wee ended up fighting and he left for a while to get some space. We haven't really spoken since. I've said sorry for my part. I feel guilty for putting him through this and crazy because of my hormones. Feel like I've made big steps forward this quarantine, but took a HUGE leap back this past week. :( 

    1. marcyabadeer


      :( I am so sorry to hear the stress is bringing distance between you two. Sometimes with this healing process it’s a forward, backward kind of thing until we find our grounding again.

      i will sitting with you if okay?



  9. Thank you all for the kind words and encouragement! I'm really looking forward to getting to know everyone and start this new journey.
  10. Hi, my name is Jade and I'm new. I am a survivor or many traumas that I'm not fully comfortable saying just yet. I found this site searching google for groups either around me I could attend in person, or online. Turns out the closest in person group is 3 hours away from me. So I am very grateful to have found AS. I am 28 years old. I'm Christian, although I've fallen pretty far away from my faith over the years. I'm a photographer and martial arts instructor. I'm married with no kids, just a couple fur babies and one feather. I come from a large family and I'm the oldest of 11 kid
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