[Hi?]

It's so hard to talk about. My close friends and family know but I feel like talking about it just makes me a disappointment. I feel like it's such a shameful thing and that it shouldn't be talked about. But so often I just want to scream to the world that I'm not okay and that something is wrong, but because of society norms I have to keep my mouth shut and not let anything crack through. It's exhausting.

[Hi?]

Hi, I just kinda have felt really alone lately so I figured I would try and see if this would help. I know that I'm not supposed to look at myself like a victim but it's so hard. I was raped in my dorm room 2 months ago. I haven't really be able to function since. He's also a student on my campus and so I walk around scared all the time because I feel like he'll come back or something. The police aren't able to charge him with anything and my school is doing nothing because he's a football player so I don't really know what else to do. I feel like it's my fault and no matter how many times people tell me it isn't I still have all this guilt and it won't go away. I feel so lost and broken and I still have to make sure that I keep my grades intact so I can graduate but most days I don't even want to leave my bed. I had to switch dorm rooms because I couldn't sleep in the other one. I just don't want to be alone anymore.