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sisyphus

Member
  • Content Count

    161
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About sisyphus

  • Rank
    Becoming Strong. The rock hasn't rolled back and crushed me yet.

Profile Information

  • Gender
    Female

Previous Fields

  • MembershipType
    Survivor

Recent Profile Visitors

249 profile views
  1. Hello, friend. I honor your grief and the sorrow of your experiences. We will not look away from your pain here, nor will we devalue you. What happened to you is not your fault. There is no "right" or "wrong" way to process trauma. Your depression is not a character flaw. I see your light and the precious being that you are. May you find relief, comfort, nourishment, safety, and the resources you need to be restored. This community has been a lifeline for me. This is the only place I feel safe being completely honest about how the trauma and my ongoing ordeal are affecting me. I
  2. @Catjaz Oh my heart goes out to you. I know this pain, very well. I know you are in a sensitive place, so please disregard this information if it is too much or sounds like advice. I'm not a therapist, but I've put a lot of time and work into understanding my own flashbacks. From what I can tell, at the time of the trauma, the part of my brain responsible for communication and processing sensory information got scrambled. The sight, the smell, the feel, the sound, the taste, the emotions, the understanding and the words all get pushed into a temporary storage box called Coping. Ove
  3. I'm learning how to manage my flashbacks, too. Successfully haven't been hospitalized hugging myself since the end of September. Going in can be helpful in some ways but at the same time can also be a trauma of its own. I'm so proud that you went in - it shows how courageous you are, and how dedicated to your own healing. I hope they were able to help you. It's taking time but I'm beginning to understand my symptoms and better relate them to the SA/CSA instead of internalizing shame. I haven't been able to make the flashbacks stop but am beginning to be able to use them cathartically so
  4. Welcome. I'm glad you're here, and I hope this forum provides solace. I'm proud of you for recognizing your complex needs. I have personally found a safety and anchor here that has been unavailable in any other part of my life. Not even with my therapist. I have discovered that I can come here in my darkest moments, and no one here will ever reinforce my shame, or make me justify my choices. It's been precious to have a place to say my nightmares out loud, and have my pain acknowledged in a world that wants to say it isn't real or that I can "choose" my way out of it. I have been able to
  5. @Srsly_Serendipitous I'm sad that you are in the position where you've had to find your way here. It is good, however, to be heard and witnessed in a most tender place. I hope you find the comfort, care, and nourishment your mind, body and soul so badly need right now, and that you find freedom in sharing stories, however painful they may be. You are a precious human and your voice makes a difference. Seeking support is courageous and brave.
  6. please, stop. please, stop. please. Please let me go home.
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