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Hope49

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    Female

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    Survivor

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  1. Hi and welcome! I know it can be scary. But please know you are in supportive hands. I injured my hand the other day in a fall but please know we are here for you. hope49
  2. Hi, Ijustneedtotalk: I'm Hope49 and I am glad you joined AS. I remember how scared I was to join...my hands shaking as I wrote my introductory email. But I found nothing but support here. I feel like I have a group of friends who actually understand what I am dealing with. I feel like no one in my work/home/personal life does that. So, I work 12 hours a day and then typically do my own thing and remain isolated most weekends. I know the feeling of "just needing to talk". Been having it all week, this week, for some reason. For some reason, one part of my assault--when I was physically attacked while trying to escape--keeps blanketing my mind and I want to talk but no one is around or its not time for therapy. Please know I am here if you want to talk...I'm also a good listener. Sitting with you, if that is ok. Hope49
  3. Hope49

    New to group

    Hi, kazb: Welcome to AfterSilence. I'm fairly new myself. I joined in late June. I found people here to be very supportive. Like you, I have trouble expressing my feelings in person sometimes. Even though it sucks in the moment and I will cry sometimes, I do feel better when I let it out. I would encourage you to journal as well. It''s very helpful. We are close in age, I turn 49 next month. If you ever need to talk, my in box is open. Hope49
  4. Hope49

    Hi

    Hi, @stormyfire, welcome. I'm fairly new. I joined in June. I remember writing my introductory post. I was scared and nervous, feeling shaky. But now I have a safe place to come to. I have talked with folks in Finland, the UK and Canada. I feel supported. Most of all, I feel that I finally have a place to come to where people understand and I can feel connected. If you need to talk, I'm here. Hope49
  5. Hi, Running: Welcome to After Silence. I'm new too. I joined about about 10 days ago. Within the first few days, I felt so much support. I could relate to the words "running" and "overwhelmed." My incident took place 10 months ago. I have definitely buried myself in my job and isolated myself to avoid my trauma. i also tend to run away from it by sleeping to avoid the pain. I'm here to cheer you on. Hope49
  6. Hi, Leda: Welcome and please know you are not alone. I can relate to what you said in your post. I had a ton of anxiety and worry while I went through the court process. My court hearing was first scheduled in Sept. 2018 and got postponed 3 times before it was finally held in January 2019. Ten days later I landed in the hospital due to failure for not taking my blood pressure medication, and all the stress and worry I went through. Please know that court postponements are common and of course, frustrating. But I am here for you and and will cheer you on. I applaud you for reporting the incident. I'm very proud of you. It's not easy. I reported my sexual assault by a neighbor 4 days after it happened. I was terrified traveling to the police station to press charges. I assumed the police would not believe me. But I was wrong, the police believed me, the prosecutors believed me, I told the truth and got justice in January 2019. Make yourself a promise that you will look forward and never look back. You have done the right thing. Hope
  7. Hi, 2Siamese: I appreciate your message and your willingness to cheer me on. I did something today that was scary and brave.I was lucky enough in January 2019 to get justice after being sexually assaulted. My attacker is one of my neighbors. He plead guilty to a plea bargain. He is on probation for a year with a suspended jail sentence. After accidentally running into him on the elevator, I've been wanting to know the terms of his probation. I was brave enough to go the records division at the county courthouse today, and examine the case file and get a copy of the probation order. I'm glad I did this, but I was shaking internally and cried a little tonight because it was like re-living the assault all over again. I'm hoping I can find support tonight. Hope
  8. Hi, Katherine: I'm Hope. I am new to the site. Just joined a few days ago. I found it inspiring and would like to commend you for being a survivor of 32 years. That gives me a sense of hope. I can relate to the sleep issue. When I have the same problem, I've read in self-help books that it can help to "ground" yourself. This means I look around my condo, I see things in real time, I talk to myself and tell myself I am safe. I hope this strategy can work for you, too. Hope you have a good week and Happy 4th of July.
  9. Hi, Abby: Welcome back to AS. I'm new to the site and thought I would say hello. I wanted to commend you for your work with special needs kids. I do volunteer work as a CASA (Court Appointed Special Advocate or CASA). It's a national organization. I recently worked with a youth who was a special needs student. I love mentoring children...been a CASA for 12+ years. The kids you work with are lucky to have you. Hope49
  10. I'm so thankful for my first 4 replies. I appreciate the welcome and can feel a sense of support.
  11. Hello, everyone: I'm a 48-year-old communications professional. I found After Silence while searching for support groups online. I'm looking to connect with others impacted by sexual assault. I keep myself isolated except for going to work full-time. I do not feel friends and family understand what I am going through. It's been about 10 months since the incident. I am hoping to connect with others to feel less isolated and deal with the aftermath of what happened. Some days I feel totally healed, other days, I feel hopeless.
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