Thank you both!
@MeBeMary I appreciate your kind words Healing is indeed quite the winding road. I was 14/15 years old when I first discovered this site, and it honestly kept me going through some of my darkest years. Now here I am, safe from what I was then experiencing. It's wild to think about that young girl and I'm grateful to say that things got better.
@Capulet Things have gotten much better for me. I moved far away from my abuser and began a healing process I didn't know was possible. Things come up, I live a life with PTSD, and sometimes it's hard to leave my house (okay, that is happening more frequently right now which is why I'm back here), but overall my life has improved. I'm able to see life through a lens of possibility rather than survival. Hope you are well! I totally think I remember your username!