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Ghost of me

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About Ghost of me

  • Birthday 07/04/1996

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  • Gender
    Female

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  • MembershipType
    Survivor

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383 profile views
  1. E4ACE8AA-9BA6-4250-AFEC-C54DAD08D5B9.jpeg

    Gorgeous💓 what's his name?
  2. I've been on autopilot for weeks now. I feel like I can't function normally anymore and the days are a struggle. The nights are worse. I wonder if it will ever get back to being "normal" again. The last assault did something to me and I'm honestly not sure if I can ever go back to being the me I was before and it scares me. I don't know.  It shouldn't be any different tho it's been going on all my life but it is. Maybe because another person was involved in it this time and I just don't know how to deal with it. I don't know but I just want to stop feeling this way.

    1. Angelonia

      Angelonia

      I'm sorry for what you are going through, Ghost of me.  You shouldn't have been treated that way, never ever.  Sending you caring thoughts and support.

  3. :!:Warning this is a rant to my friends. Or the people who used to be my friends. It's not about anyone on here. I just need to rant . Why does it have to be like this? I don't understand what I did to deserve any of this. My father I get. He's just evil. But why are you guys so mean?

    I get that I haven't spoken to you guys in a week but when you ask what's wrong I can't give you answers. I tried. You didn't want them. But still you pressure me. On and on. You see I'm panicked and not doing good but you can't leave it alone. So I break and talk. And we fight. I don't want to fight. You all leave mad.  So I guess we aren't speaking now.

    You could at least try and act like you care. A little anyway. You say you know I haven't been sleeping. That I've been crying and I look like hell. I know I do.  That I was fine and then after Tuesday I wasn't. You say you want me to open up and talk. I do and you don't listen. You don't believe me. You joke. ITS NOT A JOKE. OR A LIE. Some friends you turned out to be. I TRUSTED ALL OF YOU. My mistake. I needed you guys. You let me down. I don't know if I can ever trust you guys again. 

    1. Show previous comments  1 more
    2. Angelonia

      Angelonia

      I'm sorry you don't have the support you need right now from your friends. You deserve respect and compassion.  I'm sending safe hugs your way. :hug:

       

       

    3. Ghost of me

      Ghost of me

      @Capuletthank you I appreciate the support. Yesterday was horrible. Today's been a little better tho. 

    4. Ghost of me

      Ghost of me

      @Angeloniathanks for the hugs. I need them. I'm not sure if I can ever trust them again. At least it's gonna be awhile if I do. 

      I like the new user name btw.

  4. My talent

    Oh I love this
  5. Caps Lock Kitteh

    Such beautiful eyes Steiny's gotten bigger it looks like. I'm glad his check up went well. Sending him hugs and kisses. He's adorable.
  6. Been so angry all day. And mostly at myself. I get up the courage to do something and then I break down in the middle of it and then feel stupid and worthless. Gonna try and calm down and hopefully sleep but 5 hours seems to be it. But I guess it's better than nothing.

    1. Show previous comments  1 more
    2. Angelonia

      Angelonia

      I hope you got some rest, Ghost of me, and things look a little brighter today. 

    3. Ghost of me

      Ghost of me

      @Kmkz thanks so much. I'm trying but it's hard. Im just trying to get through each day and I keep telling myself I'm important and that I matter. It's hard to believe here lately tho. I'm glad I have AS. Theres no judgement here.

    4. Ghost of me

      Ghost of me

      @Fairlis I did but only around 5 hours (off and on) but that's because I'm really tired I know. I do feel a little rested today tho. It would be nice to sleep without nightmares. I'd gotten to the point where I could. 

  7. New and Looking for Help

    @WanderingandLostWell I read quite a few posts before I actually found the courage to comment anything about what happened to me. I know how alone you feel. My family knows what my father did to me but basically ignore it because they don't believe me. I knew not to tell about my teacher assaulting me because I wasn't believed before so why would I be now? Only I found AS and I got brave enough to actually write what happened. Just a few sentences but still. It helped so much. There's no judgement I've encountered here only support, understanding and encouragement. Perhaps writing it out may help you. Whenever you're ready tho. No pressure just safe hugs and understanding
  8. New and Looking for Help

    @WanderingandLost Welcome 😊 i'm still new here too but I'm so glad I found AS. I'm sorry for the circumstances that led to you needing to be here but we're all here for you. This is such a good community for help and support and just someone to say "you're ok" "you're not alone".
  9. Another night of no sleep. I just wish I could sleep. I mean really sleep. Like normal people do. Without nightmares. Or night terrors. Just sleep and actually be able to rest instead of fighting in my dreams and just be able to feel safe.😩

  10. Hello, I'm New Here

    @PurpleBee Hi I'm new here too and im sorry circumstances have happened to lead you to be here but we're all very supportive and caring here from what I've seen so far. I've had a hard time trying to deal with everything that's happened to me and I feel that this is a very safe and caring environment to be in and definitely non judgmental. We're all here to listen and support each other. Hope this site helps you in your healing process. Sending some positive vibes your way.
  11. Light house

    Patriciag are you a photographer? These are gorgeous and peaceful😊
  12. Welcome Home

    Steiny looks so precious. How's he settled in so far?
  13. Just FYI

    Please be assured that I will not judge you. You did nothing wrong to deserve to be assaulted. No one does. I will not be upset or freak out if you were to comment. And no I have not been abused by a female only 2 males however the females in my home( mom, older sister and aunt ) knew my dad was doing this to me and my older sister and ignored it so to me that is just the same as if they'd touched me also.
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