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optimistic

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    6
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    Female

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    Survivor
  1. Hi.Just want to say welcome .joined a few days ago.Keep on hanging in there.
  2. Hi everyone.Thankyou for taking the time to reply.
  3. Hi.Thankyou for replying!.blimey.wasnt expecting one.
  4. Hi todyln.Thanks for replying!.quite shocked.Didnt expect one.
  5. My Story hI Everyone.Before I go any further,just liked to say,I think some of the things you have gone through are horrendous!.I think you are very brave.To be honest.I dont think I fit in the same category,as I was not a child and was not abused by the hands of my parents.I feel that I was responsible for what happened to me.I cant believe that (very embarrasing),15 years after my rape.I am noticing that I am affe ted .I have to put it down in the only way I know how,so it might not make sense.sorry!.Aged 20,went to rome 2 see boyfriend.was a bit of a rebellious child.Left home at 14.Arrived at victoria station after ferry journey back from rome.didnt want to go back to old digs ,somewhere else.Decided id stay in hostel or something and stay in london.man said hed show me a hostel he knew.I naively trusted him.We must of walked 4 ages.in the end he said he could put me up in his friends house.walked further,didnt know where i was.getting dark,he said friend wasnt in,bla bla.Ended up sleeping rough.He said it would be dangerous being alone.Wont waffle on.Basically slept in confined sheltered area.got woken up in my sleep,with his hand over my mouth,it happened so quickly.I couldnt move forwards or backwards,or sideways.i was dazed.strangely enough he acted like nothing happened.i remember looking in a car mirror,to see if i looked the same.tried act normal.think i was shocked.just wanted 2 get to public place.found a cafe.paid for his coffee,he sat opposite,like nothing happened.I said to him,why did you do that to me.He just got up,looked me in the eyes coldly and said"if i see you again ,i will kill you.think mum thinks it was a date rape,because she makes comments,like.Well.if girls get drunk and dress in a certain way.what do you expect.mum and dad never asked me about the rape,nor my sister.went to old bailey on my own.lost boyfriend who i really loved in rome.cant say anymore.find it a bit draining.
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