Capulet

Well, would ya look at that...TWO blog entries in two weeks - a good start to my promise to do some more writing/mental uploading! This entry can mostly be attributed to Oompa's prompt and not-a-moment-too-soon departure on Thursday morning - she and my stepfather were here for two nights. My father (to many: 'Lord Capulet') and his wife were ALSO in town, and since Monday, I've spend every day with one or both of my parents and their spouses - 'the steps.' Yesterday afternoon was the first time we were ALL together, and I sat at the kitchen table with my four parents, having a cup of c

@Fairlis - you are definitely not alone. I, too, walk this path! However frustrating and painful it can be sometimes, it is always much, much easier when you're in good company and have the friendship and support of others who can relate. Warmest of welcomes to After Silence. I am hopeful you will find everything you are looking for! Best wishes, Capulet

Well, it seems I've started a new trend of updating 2x a month rather than weekly, but my promise to you all is that I'll TRY to blog more frequently. I have truly missed my for-the-hell-of-it writing and do resolve to get back into the routine of doing so regularly. It's important to me to keep the mental wheels turning, even if they tend to slow down from time to time. I've just not had much to update you all on - other than I've had a one-week reprieve from the wintery joy that is home - and J and I have just returned from one week in Central Florida for our 10-year anniversary cele

Hello @Azika, from a fellow cat lover! I have five of them that I adore! What are some of your favorite smells? Mine is the Winter Candy Apple from Bath and Body Works. If I could have an endless supply of the wallflower refills in that scent, I'd be in heaven. I also like the smell of brewing coffee, and burning firewood. My neighbor has no idea how much I look forward to when he uses his wood-burning stove! I also like Hawaiian/pinapple/coconut scents. I've always got a candle burning, it seems. Keeps me nice and calm! Anyway, welcome to After Silence. I'm glad you are h

Hello @musetta31 - welcome back to After Silence. I am so sorry to hear of your struggles with trauma, and that you have reason to be here. However, I'm glad you've returned - there's SO MUCH support to be gained from being among this wonderful community and I'm hopeful that your being here will bring you peace, comfort and will greatly help in your healing journey! My sincerest congratulations to you on your upcoming nuptials! How exciting. Best wishes, Capulet

Hi, @limetree - welcome back to AS! Mary is absolutely right - sometimes we have to exercise self-care and to disconnect for a little while, just until we can sort out some stuff on our own. I've done this in the past and fully encourage that if it's ever needed. I'm glad you remembered us, though, and have returned! There is never a shortage of support that can be gained from being here, but I suspect you've discovered that, already. My best wishes to you. Capulet

Hi, @Phebs!!! Welcome to After Silence! Congratulations on very recently taking that excruciatingly hard first step in breaking your silence!! That is one of the hardest steps to take in recovery - and I daresay you should be very proud of yourself for having done so. This is a fantastic community and I am hopeful that you will find all of the support you need here. It will certainly help you to 'batten down the hatches' as this coming storm passes - being around others who can relate is always helpful and might lessen its effects. Just remember - hang in there - it DOES eve

Welcome to After Silence, @LDM0426 - I echo @BraveOne and @MeBeMary - this is an extremely supportive site and although I'm sorry you've a reason to be here, I do hope that being a part of such a fantastic community brings you peace, comfort and healing. My best wishes to you! - Capulet

Welcome to After Silence, @Pastel27!!!

Have I REALLY been gone since December 4th? Yes, friends - this is VERY much unlike me. Those of you who know me - know that when my mind is cluttered and my brain is busy - I write. It's how I make sense of things. To say that my mind has been clear lately would be a lie - there's SO much clutter up there - it's starting to look like Grandma's attic! (Although MY grandmother, may she rest in peace, did not have an attic - she had a basement that scared the shit out of me for most of my childhood!) My brain has been running a mile-a-minute, but I've been effective at compartme

Welcome to AS, @Jodisue!!! We are pleased to meet you! I am so sorry to hear that you were led here due to trauma - but am hopeful that you will indeed see you definitely are not alone here. The people are absolutely wonderful and the level of support you will find here is never-ending - I truly hope that being here brings you peace, comfort and eventual healing. Take your time looking around and whenever you are ready to jump in, we'll all be ready to listen. Best wishes, Capulet

Hello, @Mave - thank you for taking the time to spread some Holiday joy - sending you some as well! Welcome to After Silence! You certainly have found a wonderful community and I am hopeful that taking the chance on us is something you'll be glad you did. Sending you all of my support as you begin to take your healing steps - I hope being here brings you peace and comfort. Best wishes, Capulet

Welcome to After Silence, @avri!!! Sending you all of my support as you embark upon your healing journey! Looking forward to getting to know you through your posts. Best wishes, Capulet

Welcome, @D She - One of the things I love the most about our community is that we, as members, are free to discover the benefits of After Silence at our own pace. I'm glad you've been looking around a little beforehand, there's nothing wrong with that at all! Thank you for introducing yourself - that was indeed a big step and one you can certainly be proud of! You are definitely not alone in your healing journey - there are many, many others who may be able to relate. I hope being here brings you eventual peace, comfort and healing. Again, welcome. Best wishes, C

Hello, @Kristen nicole - welcome to After Silence. Wishing you all the luck in the world as you embark upon your healing journey! Big kudos to you for joining our community - hopefully you will find an enormous amount of support waiting for you when you're ready. Best wishes, Capulet

YES!! This is another thing that is very difficult to explain, but you've nailed it. I am sorry this rings true for you, too. It is NOT a nice feeling, AT ALL. If only there was a way to state this to others - "I want to keep you at arms' length, but I also want you to keep trying to get closer to me." It seems...I don't know - almost as if it's a selfish, inconsiderate thing to ask, if we're being honest with ourselves. So we don't, and we kind of hope others pick up the vibe on their own. Not having a whole lot of luck with it, though - am seeing that the results are repetitive

Welcome, @Cdm to After Silence. I'm so sorry to hear that circumstances have brought you here, but please know that recognizing your need to address issues of the past is indeed a GIANT leap in the right direction! GOOD for you, for making this choice! This is a fantastic community (I know I am a little biased, but I believe it completely!) and I am hopeful that being among us will bring you comfort! Best wishes, Capulet

Hello there, @Silence Is Golden - welcome to After Silence! I am sending greetings from across the pond! (I'm American born and bred - but England is definitely a place I'd love to someday visit.) I am so sorry to hear that so many abuses have piloted your life - but am glad to see that you are taking steps at manning the controls and perhaps being here will help you to take huge strides toward healing! This is truly a wonderful community and I am sure you will find that you are not alone by any means. Happy healing! Best wishes, Capulet

I've no doubt you can, @New Joy Freedom - I too, hail from an abusive 8-year marriage - I have been free of a very, VERY unsupportive man for the last decade but there are still little things that come up from time to time. You are NOT alone, and you really are in a wonderful place to gain support for this as well as for your other traumatic experiences. I'm so sorry to hear that there are several - you didn't deserve any of it. I hope that being a part of this community will bring you peace, comfort and eventual healing. Welcome to After Silence!! Best wishes, Capulet

Hi, Kam, and welcome to After Silence! I am sorry to hear you've got trauma in your background but am hopeful that you will soon realize that you are not alone and that this is an incredibly supportive community filled with very understanding folks. Take gentle care! Best wishes, Capulet

Hi there, @Healing4Life - welcome to After Silence!! I, too, spent many years in denial before choosing to heal. I've learned that it matters none how much time has elapsed - when you're ready, you'll know it. You are truly in a good place to take these first steps, in addition to your therapy. The folks here are amazing and I am sure you will shine as both a survivor as well as a support!!! Thank you for taking the time to introduce yourself. I look forward to getting to know you through your posts. Best wishes, and again - welcome!! Capulet

Hello Cam, and welcome to After Silence. I'm so sorry for the circumstances under which you've arrived but I am hopeful that being surrounded by those who understand will be a very helpful first step toward healing. Best wishes, Capulet