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Blog Comments posted by Capulet

  1. I did smile at the thought of you and your wonderful husband, G, cherishing the time spent together making dinner.  You make something as simple as meal prep sound like something straight out of a fairy tale. :)  The wine, the music, the chatting, the sharing of kitchen duties, it all sounds so nice.  

    (Not at all like dinner prep at my house which is often nothing short of chaotic....there's me (wo)manning the kitchen as best as I can, three cats who jump on the counters to investigate the 'smells,' a dog who is one day going to burn his nose, a son and daughter who will come in and 'help' by way of taste-testing and reducing the amount of food that officially makes it to the table....LOL.)

    I am saddened you had a terrible relationship experience before he came along - but so, very, very pleased to see that he is loving, kind and attentive.  You so deserve all of the wonderfulness that G makes you feel.  I am sure you are a blessing to him, too.

    Congratulations on the new position - another deserved milestone!  I am sorry for the prattish behavior that you are having to deal with and for the triggers this brings up for you.  Keep that chin up and keep rocking the position.  I think your strategy is spot-on - just keep at the awesomeness and let him be seen for the ass he is making himself out to be. ❤️ 

    - Cap

  2. Hey, Poppy - just want you to know that I am proud of you for taking the initiative to get yourself the help you needed to pull yourself out of that terrible, dark place that you were finding yourself trapped in.  There is nothing scarier than that feeling of not wanting to be alive anymore.  It's scary for you, and it's scary for the people who care about you.  I know it does not often feel that way, but there are many who are in your corner.  I'm truly glad you're seeing that your life is, while turbulent right now, is still worth living.  I know you for a while, now, and know that you still have a whole lot of wonderful to experience.  💕

    It is unfortunate that ANYONE has to struggle, but sometimes it's helpful to remember that struggle is another way of slowly, but surely getting yourself to where you want to be.  I know you have a lot of determination within you and that you've got this.

    Even better, you've rediscovered your passion for writing!  :)  Keep at it, my friend.  

    Luv ya!

    - Cap

  3. @LisaButterfly - I'm looking forward to that coffee-sharing someday. :)  That sounds truly wonderful.  And yes, absolutely no negative messages will be displayed on the mugs - I insist on choosing the ones that have just uplifting, positive snippits!  The mugs of manipulation have since been banished to the very back of the cabinet where they'll likely remain until the kitchen remodel takes place.  As I've no plans to do that anytime soon, I think I have a few years to forget they exist. 😉

    I'm indeed feeling MUCH better nowadays.  Still have the occasional headache here and there but for the most part - feeling more human.  :) 

    Thank you, Lisa, for the kind words and the feedback, and for keeping up with your blog.  I'm finding them very enjoyable - you've definitely got a craft for it!

    - Cap

  4. Loving your writing. :)  If it's hair you wish to write about, then, so be it! There are no rights or wrongs when it comes to blogging - whatever's on the horizon is what we bloggers are likely to address - and today, it's hair.  It's all good, hun!

    My deepest congratulations on this empowering change you've made for yourself!  Undoubtedly this isn't a decision you arrived at easily or lightly, but I'm glad you're happy with this decision.  

    Enjoy the hair-free dinners! 😉

    - Cap

  5. @abhaya - there's never any pressure to give anything more than what you have.  Please know that this community appreciates all of the support you have given and all of the contributions you've made.  I know I've said this many times and will gladly say it to anyone who might need to hear it - it's OKAY to NOT BE OKAY.  Remember, these are temporary feelings and not going to last forever.  You'll get your spoons back - I promise.  

    Sending you love and hugs - hoping this finds you in a better place now that a few weeks have gone by.  Looking forward to hearing how you've been. 

    - Cap

  6. Hello, @aperson - I just wanted to say that asking for help is something I have extreme difficulty with.  I wrote about this in a recent blog of my own.  I know we have different reasons for having difficulty asking for help with anything, so I'm a little bit short on words but wanted to say that I totally understand and that I hear you on this.  

    Maybe one day, we will both have some clarity on this and we'll be okay with asking for help - we are, after all, human.  We all need help, sometimes. :)  

    Hope your weekend is a good one. :) 

    All the best,


  7. @LisaButterfly - I know I said this to you privately, but I will say it for all to hear - I know you have a lot to say, I can tell.  I applaud you on your bravery to start a blog and your determination to make your voice even louder and to be heard by those who can relate to what you're thinking and feeling.  I look forward to hearing more from you and to getting to know you. :)

    Keep writing.  It's truly healing. ❤️ 

    - Cap

  8. Hello, @PearlofMary - it's so nice to hear from you.  

    Thank you for the very kind words.  I agree there are a lot of 'aha' moments; some don't require too much thinking and others catch us WAY off-guard.  I hope your puzzle begins to 'take shape,' too and that some of those pieces that have been 'unconnected' are able to begin interlocking for you.  I wish I could say it's a good feeling when that does happen, but I suppose we can take comfort in knowing that neither one of us alone.

    I hope you are taking gentle care of yourself these days! ❤️ Here if you ever needed to talk.

    All the best,

    - Cap

  9. @Tearsonmypillow -

    Hi there!  Welcome to the site, and thank you so much for dropping by.  

    I'm so sorry you are going through this.  :(  I didn't 'see' what was happening to me at the hands (or mouth) of my ex-husband until after we'd separated and our divorce was pending.  I think that when we're too close to a situation, it's very difficult to see the toxicity within.  You are absolutely right - spousal rape is abuse.  It need only happen ONCE for it to be abuse.  I do agree that both your husband and my ex-husband have good qualities within - they must have - there was a time when we loved them.  When things change, it truly is disheartening and heartbreaking.  :(  I hope you know that NONE of this is your fault, and that there is absolutely NO justification for a husband to treat his wife like this.  

    Where do we start to pick up the pieces?  Well - this is different for everyone.  I'm glad you're here, though, this is truly a supportive community and a good place to begin communicating and connecting with others who are currently or who have been in the same boat.  A support system is vital.  We do have a Domestic Violence forum here, and you're welcome to look around there and see if some of the posts there are relatable - because I do think you will find that you're not alone in your thoughts.  It's not an easy situation to break away from, especially when there are children involved, but it's not impossible.  

    If you'd like to talk privately sometime, you're welcome to send me a PM anytime --> @Capulet <-- (hover over my username and hit the 'message' envelope at the bottom!)

    Hoping to hear from you soon - and again - welcome to the site.  


  10. Thank you, Goldie, for all of your kind words!  

    We've not yet deleted the Zillow app from our phones, we're still undecided if we'll stay here.  We currently have well people in our yard, working on trying to open it up. They are trying something called Hydro Fracturing, (hydro fracking) so...moment of truth!  Guess we'll see first off, if this works, and secondly, if there's any relief in sight.  You're right - some houses look pretty on the outside and inside but in reality, they can 'house' unbelievable problems, no pun intended.  

    I'll keep everyone posted.  Thank you so much - appreciate your support!  ❤️

    - Cap

  11. @Zoeloves -

    Hi there!

    I want you to know that I read your response many times.  It means the whole entire world to me that you've said this.  It made me feel as if I'm truly on the right track - with school, with my work here, with accomplishing long-term goals.  Sometimes I wonder if I've gone off-course, but it was truly wonderful to sign in to see your kind words.  For this, thank you from the bottom of my heart.  It truly is very nice to hear these words from someone - especially since it's been a few months since this was posted.  

    I'm so glad that you feel validated in that there is absolutely no justifiable reason for anyone to have harmed you.  Too often, we dwell on the idea that there MUST be something we've done to deserve this - to somehow make the pain someone else has caused us 'acceptable.'  It has taken more time than I care to admit to realize that there is no reason at all, and that bad behavior of those around us are a result of nothing we've done, but everything to do with THEM.

    Grateful for you, too.  Thank you again. ❤️ 

  12. @girlsnz - thanks for reaching out!  I'm so sorry for the loss of your brother, with whom you felt very close.  :( 

    Please know though, that it's a huge leap in the right direction to be able to put into words what you feel is holding you back from taking that next step.  How to get past it is always a much, much harder question that we'll soon have to address, but to identify the barrier and reason for it is amazing in itself.  Be proud of yourself for that!!!  That's truly not an easy realization to make.  I'm still stuck on a few of my own pebbles that require further analyzing!  

    I do hope you'll someday be able to show that child within you the compassion and love that she deserves.  I know all too well that this is yet another thing that is easier said than done....but know you have my support.  We are on this walk together and it's helpful to have company.  Always available through PM if you ever wanted to talk.

    Thanks again for your feedback!!!  

    - Cap

  13. Hey, Gold Raindrops. :)

    Well, the Quilster got the job done that night - now I need a warrior that will ALLOW my body to let me sleep for longer periods of time.  It just doesn't cooperate, no matter how nicely I ask. LOL.  

    Gonna try it again tonight - but actually NEED it - throat starting to feel scratchy.  These 8am classes are going to require two things in order for me to be able to function - coffee and more than three hours' sleep the night before!

    Hope all's well wih you!  Thanks for stopping by!

    - Cap

  14. Hi, @AKB -

    How's the door-slamming going? :)  I'm sorry, friend.  I did know that 2019 wasn't a good year for MANY, and was sad to hear you, too, have been struggling.  Yes, let 2020 bring forth good and wonderful things!!! ❤️  Consider 2019 sent packing.  

    @vitamin - Thank you, friend, for gentle note.  You are right - at least the holidays have been shoved back into boxes and back up the attic - there won't be any need to worry about any of this until this year's Black Friday.  By then, I'm hoping to be in a place where I can appreciate it all for what it's intended to be and not dread it, so much.  A lot of changes must be made this year, and I'm working on 'em, little by little. :)  I'm hoping YOUR holiday with family and friends was a truly blessed time!

    @goldraindrops - that's my hope, too. :)  So far, so good.  I mean, I'm sure 2020 will dish out its share of grief and little moments of frustration, but I do hope to keep myself grounded and handle them in a healthier manner.  My family is FULL of some very complicated people, and it IS truly hard to work with that, but I'm hopeful, having already taken some steps last year. 

    As always, it's so nice hearing from you guys.  Thank you.  :)  Happy New Year. ❤️ 

  15. @Iheartcupcakes - that woman lives in so many of us here - it truly IS heartbreaking how many of us are that very same woman.  I am proud to call you my friend, too.  You're an amazingly strong force, Amy.  :throb: Thank you, friend, for holding my hand through this.

    @MzKeys75 - Thank you, dear....I never really thought of it that way - of being my own superhero that night - I can honestly say that in the moment, I felt the complete opposite of a superhero....I felt helpless and vulnerable enough that night to be able to see very little light at the end of that tunnel - but in hindsight, I do see how I did everything I needed to do in order to just arrive at the point where I could go to sleep and END the day.  I know a lot of mistakes were made that night, but even superheroes falter in judgement, decision-making, etc.  It took me a long time to forgive those missteps, and to realize that I did everything I thought I needed to do in order to survive.  I appreciate your words, very much!!!

    @2Siamese - I didn't know that about you!!!!  Bravo to you for working with the deaf and hard-of-hearing community.  Our community NEEDS more people like you, who can help raise awareness on this!!!!  I don't know too many deaf or hard-of-hearing folks who have been through SA/similar hardships but am SURE they exist.  Where there is lack of support, there is indeed increased silence. :(  We should definitely talk more on this, someday!

    Thank you all.  My heart is truly blessed to have my AS family.


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