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cac142

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    Survivor

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  1. I've been raped/assaulted four times now. The first time was in Italy-I was on a crowded bus with my study abroad group when a man just stuck his fingers up the edge of my shorts and inside me. I didn't know what to do, I have no idea how to react. It took me nearly a week of sleepless night to tell my professor-his reaction was amazing, so compassionate, so helpful, but the police did NOTHING. The second time, I was in a taxi on the way home from a friend's house in Korea-I didn't know where I was, and he took me to a construction site and raped me. Beat me, nearly killing me. The police blamed me-I had to go through lie detector tests and everything-because I must have known him, I must have asked for it. I dealt with a lot of guilt and fear and negative emotions after that. Finally I started to feel better, but recently I was assaulted. I was groped in an elevator at my current job. No one would believe it though, I don't want to deal with putting my name through that to try to have anything done about it. About a month ago, I was with someone I trusted, someone I was starting to date, but I SAID NO. I said it over and over again, but he thought it was a joke, he thought it was a game. I don't want to tell, because I have no proof-we were hanging out a lot, but I didn't want it to happen. I have nightmares all the time. I don't know what to do-I don't want to it happen to someone else, but I don't think anything would actually happen to him. I'm so torn, I don't know what to do.
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