AnneRuth

Yeah, I feel like I want to but I don't have the strength. I just found out tonight that he had lied to me about how many girls he has been with and it hurts so incredibly much. It is clear to me what I should do, it just feels so hard to get up the strength to leave. I live with him, so it would be a huge step and a lot of work.

@GaleH Like what should I do..? He is my very fist boyfriend and we have been together for almost a year. I feel like I shouldn't give him up so easily but yet I am just so tired of fighting for him. I want him to fight for me for once.

After everything happened I just laid there and cried trying to get everything out of my head. His face, his voice. I then walked downstairs where my sister was sitting and she has asked if I had finally gotten "laid". She was the girl all the boys fell over and I guess in her mind she was trying to help...? Apparently, he told her that I refused to do anything with him and kicked him out, which he had said to cover the rape. I was so scared of him and the embarrassment that I just went along with it. Ever since I moved I haven't talked to my sister, I have no idea what I would say. I am slowl

Thank you @Mishmash and @jenay I really appreciate your thoughts. <3

I feel like I cannot talk to anybody about this who know's me because it makes me feel embarrassed, weak like I am being judged and nobody I know has gone through the same thing. So they really cannot understand anything, I just find it is pointless. Hopefully, I can talk and hear about other people's stories and finally find some peace. I am 18, I am with the first boyfriend of 9 months. I had never gotten much positive attention from guys about my personality, they only wanted sex which I would never give for I have made the decision to wait until marriage. Around a year ago my sister