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Ayla3

Member
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Status Updates posted by Ayla3

  1. It's past midnight which I guess makes today the anniversary... officially...weird...

    1. Show previous comments  6 more
    2. Painnbroken

      Painnbroken

      You're welcome! 

    3. tuliptorn

      tuliptorn

      Sitting with you. Safe hugs.

    4. Ayla3

      Ayla3

      Thank you @tuliptorn ☺️ the support is very welcome...

  2. The one friend I told right after it happened just randomly reached out to me today, I want to ask her what she remembers but I don't know if I should....

    1. Show previous comments  6 more
    2. Bluesclues

      Bluesclues

      So you are going to try to get some answers? I'm excited if you are

       

    3. Ayla3

      Ayla3

      Yeah...am at the moment but don't think I'll get any. Don't think this will be very validating either...

    4. Bluesclues

      Bluesclues

      Well I'm very happy that you will try either way! I wasn't validated when I talked to the teachers but I did something. 

  3. Attending a going away party at work later, it will be loud, it will be annoying and I will want to run away. Wish me luck and a quick getaway! 

    1. Show previous comments  5 more
    2. Ayla3

      Ayla3

      Seconded! Also I'm wearing sandals so there goes that!

    3. Painnbroken

      Painnbroken

      Pocket riding with you if not too late.  :hug:. If you need to escape run to the nearest exit or restroom to collect yourself hon.  

    4. Ayla3

      Ayla3

      Not too late, have another 2+ hours to go until then. I might use the restroom strategy and go hide a bit if it gets too much, thanks :) 

  4. Anxious about the week ahead... actually...just anxious. Wish me luck! 

  5. Still feeling off today...

    1. Show previous comments  4 more
    2. Ayla3

      Ayla3

      Thanks @Dahliaa but it's looking like it's going to be one of those weeks ☺️ I'll be fine though!

    3. Dahliaa

      Dahliaa

      Aww, well keep me updated on how you're feeling please! I've had one of those weeks as well. It'll pass eventually. 

    4. Ayla3

      Ayla3

      Thanks @Dahliaa, just got a hurdle at the end of next week... But I will 🙂

  6. Odd woman out at this party. Clutching my phone as if it were a life raft.... Looking forward to breathing again when I leave.

    1. Show previous comments  3 more
    2. Ayla3

      Ayla3

      I'm sure once I'm out I'll feel a lot better indeed. I've been keeping on, I talked, made people laugh even but now I've reached my limit and feel like I'm shutting down... haven't said a word in probably an hour.

    3. Ayla3

      Ayla3

      Thanks! I think you're totally right. It wasn't easy but at least I won't regret not going and I avoid the guilt trip. On my way home now, not there yet but it's progress. Thanks again!! 

    4. limbodante

      limbodante

      Glad to hear you survived :)

  7. Totally fried.

    1. Show previous comments  2 more
    2. Ayla3

      Ayla3

      Thanks @Free2Fly I'm sorry you're going through a rough time right now. Thanks you, I'm just not really up for much talking right now, but I'll be alright :) Hope you're doing ok!

      Thank you @Dahliaa :) 

    3. Free2Fly

      Free2Fly

      I am coping ish... sorry your not doing okay. :( 

    4. Ayla3

      Ayla3

      No need, I'm doing better already. Just need to relax a bit and focus on other things...

  8. So low...

    1. Show previous comments  2 more
    2. Painnbroken

      Painnbroken

      Sitting with you and :hug::hug::hug::hug:

    3. Ayla3

      Ayla3

      Thanks @Painnbroken, just trying to shut off my brain for the rest of the day...

    4. Painnbroken

      Painnbroken

      You're welcome and I understand that.  :hug:

  9. That feeling when you're in an office full of people, in a crowded city yet you feel like you're all alone. Fun times....

    1. Show previous comments  1 more
    2. limbodante

      limbodante

      "You can talk and still say nothing, be together but alone." It's an awful feeling, It helps to be friends with yourself so you have someone to talk to. And I don't mean that in the goofy way you know I say things, I mean if you like yourself you can be content as you are. You have many good qualities, try to get in touch with them, see you as a friend might, and the loneliness lessens some, because you realise you're enough :)

    3. snmls

      snmls

      Yup, I know that feeling all too well.  Sitting with you if that's okay.

    4. Ayla3

      Ayla3

      Sound advice @limbodante but I'm not my biggest fan right now, me and myself are a bit on the outs at the moment... When that passes I think what you said might come in handy ☺️

  10. TW -  I just found out my autistic nephew tried to take his own life due to unrequited love, we're not close and I'm not quite sure how to process this news....

    1. Show previous comments  1 more
    2. MeBeMary

      MeBeMary

      I agree with Blues, no one really knows how they can or will process news like this. It is sad to hear when anyone makes the attempt. Beyond that, you will process however you need to process in your own time. Until then, just be good to yourself. :hug: if ok.

    3. Free2Fly

      Free2Fly

      Damn I am sorry hope he can get the support and care he needs and can continue to live no one should have to result to that ever.

      sending you supportive hugs.

    4. Ayla3

      Ayla3

      Thanks @Bluesclues:)

      Thanks @MeBeMary I just don't know if it should affect me more than it is.

      I agree @Free2Fly I'm really sorry he felt that was his only option, he's getting help now so let's hope for the best. Thanks :) 

  11. Our home just got sold, no decent warning, just had the new owner on the phone... I know I should get organised and start thinking ahead but right now all I can think is that I've lost my home, my safe place... I feel like I've been knocked off of my already delicate balance...

    1. Show previous comments  1 more
    2. Ayla3

      Ayla3

      I knew she wanted to sell since earlier in the year but we haven't had a single visit or any news from the (former) landlady in 2 months...Last I knew a sale fell through and now somebody signed papers yesterday... I'm just trying not to panic at the moment really. I'll be contacting a tenants union on Monday to see what our rights are, not letting this just be. I have no idea by when we need to be out, haven't even received our notice... Part of me wants to just sit down and cry, the other get up and fight...

    3. limbodante

      limbodante

      That's messed up, I hope you can get some kind of support or advocacy or something, there's got to be some kind of tenancy protection to prevent that happening :/

    4. Ayla3

      Ayla3

      Hope so...will try to figure that out after the weekend... 

  12. Feeling pretty damn useless at this point....

    1. Show previous comments  1 more
    2. oceonwaves

      oceonwaves

      you are truly not useless ,  it is just what you have been through that makes us think we have little or no value.  and yes you are valued :candle::hug: :hug:

    3. Ayla3

      Ayla3

      Thanks @limbodante I'll try to tell myself that lol :) 

    4. Ayla3

      Ayla3

      I guess it was just one of those days @oceonwaves, better now, thanks a lot, it's appreciated :) 

  13. On my way to a high school, just when I thought I was out, they pull me back in... Yeap kind of stressing out...

    1. Show previous comments  1 more
    2. Ayla3

      Ayla3

      I agreed to be in a jury for end of year paper presentations. Got it done, went alright, stepped out of my comfort zone and lived to tell the tale... Thanks ☺️

    3. Bluesclues

      Bluesclues

      That's good!

    4. tuliptorn
  14. Kind of empty today...need to reboot...

    1. Show previous comments  1 more
    2. Painnbroken

      Painnbroken

      I'm sorry you're empty today.  Try to relax if possible and take gentle care of yourself.  Safe :hug:if ok. 

    3. Ayla3

      Ayla3

      I'll be fine @Free2Fly, thanks :)

      Thanks @Painnbroken, I'll get to bed soon and at least try to chill a bit. Hope you're doing alright, saw your post, I'm sending you good vibes!!!

    4. Painnbroken

      Painnbroken

      You're welcome and thank you I will alright and thanks for the good vibes. :)

  15. Woke up, migraine still there...bring on Wednesday I guess *eyeroll*.

    1. Show previous comments  1 more
    2. Ayla3

      Ayla3

      Thanks :) Then again, I haven't been very polite to the migraine so... :) 

    3. Free2Fly

      Free2Fly

      Well migraines don't deserve our kindness all they do is cause pain. Lol 😂 

    4. Ayla3

      Ayla3

      My thought exactly! :) 

  16. Going back to work after a few days away... dreading it. Almost trying to find excuses not to go...

    1. Show previous comments  1 more
    2. Ayla3

      Ayla3

      Thanks, I've been able to use the force and keep them off my back for now :) 

    3. LuthienTinuviel

      LuthienTinuviel

      here is an invisibility cloak. the lightsaber might not be enough.

    4. Ayla3

      Ayla3

      I might use that one on my way home now or if I plan on any cat burglary tonight! Thanks!

  17. Feeling a bit stuck, it's like I haven't dealt with any of this in forever. Not sure where to go from here.

    1. Show previous comments  1 more
    2. Dahliaa

      Dahliaa

      Sorry you're feeling this way :( Sitting with you through this.

    3. Miny

      Miny

      Hi I know what it feels like to think that you are stepping backward from your progress. Fortunately it's not the truth, it's just a feeling and it will pass. Please hold on!

      Miny.

    4. Ayla3

      Ayla3

      Thanks @Kris78 I hope you're doing alright!

      Thank you @Dahliaa, I'm alright, just overthinking probably. Hope your weekend is going well!!

      I actually feel like I've reached a bit of a no man's land really, not moving forward or backward just...just stuck @Miny but thank you for the kind words, it's appreciated. Take care! 

  18. My mind is racing... I'm all over the place.

    1. Show previous comments  1 more
    2. Dahliaa

      Dahliaa

      Sitting with you! Safe :hug:

    3. Ayla3

      Ayla3

      Thank you both @Dahliaa and @Painnbroken!! Doing better today or maybe being sick again just helped clear my mind lol. But at least my mind is slightly more at ease...

    4. Painnbroken

      Painnbroken

      You're welcome glad to hear your doing better today.   :hug:

  19. Overwhelmed... impending changes are starting to feel very real...

    1. Dahliaa

      Dahliaa

      Praying for your strength during these times. Everything will turn out alright :hug: 

    2. Ayla3

      Ayla3

      Thank you @Dahliaa I'm sure you're right it's just hard to see at the moment 🙂

    3. Dahliaa

      Dahliaa

      It always is. Just take it one day at a time and don't neglect what you feel. It's okay to feel upset.

  20. Just love having to deal with last minute bureaucracy, why doesn't like stress sprinkled with some more stress?

    1. Free2Fly

      Free2Fly

      :hug:  sorry it's stressful right now it always seems reinforced with more stress sometimes.

    2. limbodante

      limbodante

      The only thing worse than bureaucracy... besides the spelling, jeez, who came up with that one, that took me like 12 seconds to type!... is last minute bureaucracy! That's a lotta sprinkles of stress... how about some whipped breathing to go with it? I hope things work out *hugs*

    3. Ayla3

      Ayla3

      Thanks @Free2Fly it's just becoming a bit much right now, something's gotta give.

      @limbodante let spellcheck be your friend! I'll settle for a slice of break or a dollop of good luck, thanks! 

  21. Time for some rest, shutting out the outside world for a bit....

    1. Free2Fly

      Free2Fly

      :hug: hope your okay?

    2. Ayla3

      Ayla3

      Thanks @Ian37  those couple of hours were very needed.

      I'm alright @Free2Fly just very tired...

    3. Free2Fly

      Free2Fly

      Yeah sleep tight and enjoy some much needed rest :) 

  22. One step forward, two steps backwards.

    1. Free2Fly

      Free2Fly

      :hug: hope your okay?

    2. limbodante

      limbodante

      Sounds like the cha cha ^_^

    3. Dahliaa

      Dahliaa

      :hug: Sitting with you.

  23. One step forward, two steps back...

    1. limbodante

      limbodante

      Turn around and moonwalk unto victory!

    2. Ayla3

      Ayla3

      Not sure how to apply that but I'll take it under advisement...🙂

  24. Alone and throwing myself a pity party...

    1. reglois

      reglois

      :bighug:  join u

       

    2. Ayla3

      Ayla3

      thanks....we got ice cream, so we got that going for us

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