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Everything posted by melissa

  1. melissa

    Hello Hello

    Awesome name Typo! Welcome to AS!
  2. melissa


    Welcome to AS!
  3. melissa

    Hi :)

    Hi Meg, I hope you find wonderful support and friendship here. Welcome! Melissa
  4. Hi, I guess this is kind of late. And perhaps it's not much help, because it's basically going to echo what other posts have said. But, I know in my situation, my mother sided with my abuser (who was not in my family), and refused to take me out of the school where he was. Now, I love my mother dearly, and I know it's not her fault that I was abused. But as my mother, I expected her to protect me. My abuser hurt me once, I told my Mom, and she did nothing. Then he hurt me 3 more times before the school year finally ended. Again, I don't blame my mother, but I wanted her to save me. I ended up having to move out of my mother's house, and sever contact for awhile, so that I could process what happened in what I felt was a safer environment. Because she didn't protect me then, I didn't think she would if anything else ever happened. Perhaps your daughters are feeling something similar. Please, don't take this the wrong way, I am NOT, DEFINITELY NOT saying it was your fault, because as you said, you are a victim here, but as children we want our parents to protect us from things that are too big for us to handle. If it was indeed you that arranged visits with their abuser than perhaps they are feeling a little angry. I see my Mom regularly now, I always spend the night Saturday. But it took awhile to reach that point. I had to heal a little bit (through MUCH therapy), and she had to agree to some terms/boundaries. I would recommend therapy for your daughters. Also, there are some really good reading materials, and I believe whitedove recommended some websites. Umm...I really hope this helped, and if you have any more questions, or am confused by anything i said (sometimes I don't make much sense) PM me. Good luck on your journey, take care, melissa
  5. "While we wait in silence for that final luxury of fearlessness, the weight of that silence will chocke us." -Audre Lorde "There is no agony like an untold story inside of you," Maya Angelou "The best thing you can do is realize that there's nothing wrong with you, and that it isn't your fault. Everything around you was the crazy part." -unknown "When we speak we are afraid our words will not be heard or welcomed. but when we are silent, we are still afraid. So it is better to speak" Audre Lorde "Ask for what you want and be prepared to get it." -Maya Angelou "People remain who they are even when their faces fall to pieces" -Bertolt brecht "A bird doesn't sing because it has an answer. It sings because it has a song." -Maya Angelou "From my obscurity came forth a light and illuminated my path." -Kahlil Gibran "We tell lies when we're afraid...afraid of what we don't know, afraid of what other will think, afraid of what will be found out about us. But every time we tell a lie, the thing we fear grows stronger." -Tad Williams "What breaks in a moment may take years to mend." -Swedish Proverb "Like a tiny bird through a storm ccloud sky, a tiny piece winged its way through the chaos." -Katherine Patterson (Bridge to Terabithia) "We endure so much more than we think we can, all human experience testifies to that. All we need to do is learn not to be afraid of the pain. Grit your teeth and let it hurt. Don't deny it, don't be overwhelmed by it. it will not last forever. One day the pain will be gone and you'll still be here." -Harold Kushner "People take different roads seeking fulfillment and happiness. Just because they're not on your road doesn't mean they've gotten lost." -H Jackson browne "The walls be build around us to keep out the sadness, also keep out the joy." -Jim Rohn "Among true friends there are no secrets even if there are no words" -unknown "The courage to be is the courage to accept oneself in spite of being unacceptable." -Paul Pillich "The real difficulty is overcoming how you think about yourself. If we don't have that, we never grow, we never learn, and sure as hell we should never teach." -Maya Angelou "I am not a teacher only a fellow travelor of whom you asked the way. I point ahead, ahead of myself as well you." -George Bernard Shaw
  6. welcome to AS! i hope to see you around. take gentle care, melissa
  7. welcome to AS...better late then never! Take care, melissa
  8. welcome to AS! It is an amazing community of survivors, and I hope to see you around! Melissa
  9. Welcome to AS! Hope to see you around, Melissa
  10. Hello angel baby, I love you! *hug* You already know what I am going to say, so I'm not going to say it. lol.
  11. welcome here! see you around, melissa
  12. hello, welcome to AS. this is a wonderful place. there is no pressure to post until u feel ready. u r not alone. Melissa
  13. Welcome to AS! I think you are in the right place. Hang in there, you are a survivor! Melissa
  14. Welcome to AS! See you around, Melissa
  15. melissa


    Welcome to AS! Melissa
  16. melissa


    Welcome to AS! See you around, Melissa
  17. melissa


    Welcome to AS! Love your name btw...it's awesome. Melissa
  18. melissa


    Hello Ashley! Oh wow...7 weeks old! So cute! Welcome to AS! See you around, melissa
  19. melissa

    New Person

    welcome to AS! Glad you're here! melissa
  20. melissa

    New Here

    Wow...I'm so sorry for all you have been through. As for the justice thing...it's your call. If you feel compelled to do it, go for it! But it's a long and sometimes painful process. But if you think you'll gain something from it, go for it! <sorry if that was too much, or depressing or whatever> Welcome to AS though! Glad to see you! Melissa
  21. Welcome back! Take care, see you around!
  22. melissa


    Welcome to AS! Glad to have you! By the way...no pressure to share your story. We will still be here to listen when you are comfortable. There's no rush.
  23. Welcome to AS! There is tons of friendship to be found here! I'm glad you joined! melissa
  24. Wow, what an awesome first post. However, I am sorry for all that you have been through, and I'm glad you're here. Welcome to AS! melissa
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