It´s difficult for me to post here, because in a way, it implies admitting what happened to me. It´s something that happened 20 years ago. He was my boyfriend at the time. Besides, there were some other episodes as a child. All these years, even though I always knew it happened, I felt numb about it. I acted like it never happened. But a couple of months ago, after a therapy session, I started realizing it all. And now I can´t stop crying every time something reminds me of it. I try to avoid thinking about it, but I know it´s not good for me to continue hiding it. I have started telling some very close friends (just the idea that something bad happened, not the details), but it´s very difficult for me to disclose something that I kept to myself for so long. I can´t even say the word out loud to name what happened. I have mixed feelings, and I judge myself for crying so much for something that happened so long ago. I hope this site can help me understand what is happening to me. I feel confused and ashamed of feeling how I feel. PS: I have read the guidelines regarding Triggering Warnings, but I´m not sure if I understood everything correctly, given that English is not my first language. Please let me know if something that I wrote could be triggering in any way. If so, I sincerely apologize.