Thank you, Mary. It feels validating when you say this is a huge step (although I have the peanut gallery in my head telling me otherwise... rudely). All I have been able to do so far is look at a few forums and shake and hyperventilate and cry and try not to vomit or run get a bottle of vodka. Just seeing that so many people have found their way here makes me feel less like a freak. It's heartbreaking that we all have a reason to be here. But I need to hope that there is another way of surviving other than slow self-destruction. I've been doing that for decades. I'm tired of it. It is difficult to make my hands type these things, because my brain is screaming out that I need to maintain my safety by maintaining my silence... but it's too much to do on my own. So, thank you for your kind words and helping me feel less alone.