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Everything posted by Ardatha

  1. (((Ciariadove))) Welcome to After Silence. One of the beautiful things about this website is there is no time table for you to follow. Post as you're able. I'm glad you found the courage to look for, and find, us although I am sorry that you have a need to do so. I'm sure you'll find this place to be nurturing and caring. Meg
  2. (((WarChild))) Welcome to After Silence. I'm sorry you couldn't bring yourself to post the first time around but am hoping this time will be the charm for you. Obviously, in a perfect world you would have no reason for being here and I'm sorry you do, but I'm glad you decided to try again. This is a very nurturing and caring site. Hopefully you will find what you need here. Meg
  3. (((Soloko))) It always is harder in the beginning but as you begin to heal and learn the truths they try to keep from us, it begins to get easier. The most difficult feelings to deal with are the shame, guilt, and feeling like so much disposable garbage. The saddest thing is that none of our perps feel these things and they are the ones who should!!! Remember, none of what happened was your fault. You did nothing wrong and certainly did not invite the abuse. You were a child and simply did not know any better. Also, please know there is no time pressure for you to post your story.
  4. Welcome to After Silence, Soloko. I'm glad you found us here, even if I'm sorry you had a reason to after all. I hope this place will be good for your healing process. We're all on your side, sweetie, and will help any way we can. This is a very comforting, supportive, and caring place to be. Meg
  5. (((Kat))) Welcome back, hun. There are other reasons for being here than needing help and if you can help others along in their healing journey what better goal can you have? An outlet like this can also help you maintain your stability in RL. Whatever your reasons, sweetie, I'm glad you decided to come back. Welcome home. Meg
  6. (((AutumnAngelle))) You're home, dear one. Relax and enjoy the company of others who've been were you are and felt what you feel. Here you will find a community of the most caring people on the net, I swear! Everyone here is a beautiful soul and loves to support, comfort, and nurture others. I hope you find peace here and always remember you are no longer alone. Meg
  7. (((Boo))) Glad to see you back, dear one! I've wonderd often how you were doing, and am very glad to see you've been doing well. I must admit, though, that I am sorry you gave up dancing because you did it so well. I remember some of the pix you posted. (sigh) Flight without wings. Oh well, I do understand that once the thrill is gone... been there myself, although not about dancing! Welcome back, sweetie!!! Ardatha
  8. It's good to see you looking so much better, Lindsay. Glad to see you back. Meg
  9. ((((swaskiw)))) Welcome home, sweetie. I think you'll find this to be an incredible site full of supportive, caring people. I also think you'll find that you've come to the right place. Ardatha
  10. ((((Sleeper)))) Hon, you are in a forum surrounded by people who've gone through similar circumstances to yours. They are at different stages of their healing. We have all, at one time or another, been where you are and every place inbetween. If anybody understands you, it's us. There are going to be times when you'll read this forum voraciously, and some times you simply aren't going to feel like responding. We all go through those stages, for various reasons. It isn't that we don't care, because we all do. Some days, though, even simply caring takes more energy than we have in rese
  11. Welcome to After Silence!
  12. (((((Trinity))))) I am very sorry to hear about your previous ab*se at a different forum. I would like to say that can't happen here but I can't control everyone so I guess I can't say that. I can say though that I've never seen it happening here. The people on this forum appear to be loving, nurturing, caring and supportive. Our primary goal is helping you continue on your healing journey wherever that may take you. Welcome to the forum and I hope you find it as supportive as I have. Ardatha
  13. (((Ray of Hope))) What's even better is that many hang around after healing to help comfort and support fellow forum members. Stay safe. Meg
  14. (((Ray of Hope))) I have been to many different forums on the net - some for ab*se and some not - and yet this one is the friendliest, warmest, most caring and loving one I've found. The people here will respond to anybody's cry for help and always give the best of themselves. I hope you find it a good place to be. Meg
  15. Ardatha


    ((((davey)))) I think you'll find the people on this site to be very supportive and caring. There is a wealth of experience on this site and it can be a great support system in conjunction with therapy, which you are currently doing. Best of luck to you and lots of Ardatha
  16. ((((Foreverxsilent)))) Welcome to the forum, hun. Although I deplore the reason you need to be here, I'm glad you found us. I'm sure you'll find this to be a very caring and supportive environment. We're here anytime you need us. Take extra good care of yourself because you deserve it. Ardatha
  17. Hi, Sweetie, Welcome to AS. It is not mandatory that you share your story with us to be able to be a member here. Some never do. In fact, I don't think I have myself, other than mentioning CSA by a family member when I first joined. There are many different reasons people share their stories for and that's okay, too. Maybe someday you'll be able to share your story. Or maybe you never will. In my case, there's no real point in sharing mine. It was a very long time ago and I've done my healing so I don't feel it's necessary. The choice is yours, dear one. Just know that you are welco
  18. (((Sarah))) Welcome to AS. You are definitely in the right place, although I am sorry that you need to be here. This is a great group of folks who are very warm, caring, and supportive. I think you'll like it here. Ardatha
  19. (((Alex))) It' so good to see you home again, hun!!! I've missed your gentle presence on the forum! I'm also sorry to hear that things have been so rough for you. I hope they get better for you soonest!!! You know you can PM me any time you need a friend or want to chat with someone. Take all the time you need to get better soonest! Warm gentle cyberhugs to you, dear one. Ardatha
  20. Hi Willow, Welcome to After Silence. Your biology tutor is a perfect illustration for the question - "why is it that those who have nothing (good) to say insist on saying it?" So, when did doctors start tutoring biology? (snort) She sounds like a silly git and you'd be doing yourself a favor by ignoring her. ;) My heart went out to you while reading your post. You have articulated the feelings and thoughts that many of us survivors deal with, or have dealt with, and although you'd think after all this time I'd become a bit jaded having read so many of them, I am grateful that this is
  21. Hi Endless, I've already welcomed you to the forum but I wanted to address another issue here. Yes, it is perfectly okay that you are a male and you are definitely welcome here. Actually there are more than one other male here so you are not alone at all. Unfortunately surviving is not a gender based condition, so I'm sure you'll be very welcomed here. This is a great community and everyone tries to be here for each other. I hope you find the caring and support here that we've all come to appreciate the forum for. Ardatha
  22. Yeah but how many years experience have you had at it??? LOL I've had 34 years experience at being 18. ;) Welcome to AS. Ardatha
  23. The most mind boggling thought just struck me. We are over one thousand members on this one forum. I am sure this is not the only survivor forum on the internet. Just trying to imagine, conservatively, how many of us there are is overwhelming... definitely way too many!!! (((Dreamer))) Welcome to the forum. I hope you find the support and comfort you are seeking here. This is an awesome community of truly selfless people who frequently help others, despite their own pain and current issues. Ardatha
  24. (((Diana))) Welcome to After Silence. One of the things we do very well here is friends! I'm sure you'll make a bunch! Ardatha
  25. (((Beth))) Your friend sounds like the perfect best friend and I can understand your concern about driving her way. True, it can be overwhelming to be the friend of someone who's gone through what you have. While she's being a wonderful friend I can almost guarantee that she wishes there were some way she could take your pain away. Of course, she can't do that so it makes her feel frustrated and useless. I think, to preserve your friendship, you need to try to rely on her as little as possible - using other resources (such as your therapist and this forum) so she doesn't feel so overwhelm
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