[Hi To Everyone I Am New]

Hello Mark,

You sound like a great husband who loves his wife dearly and I also sense some anger with other family member (her mother) as well. I told my husband when I realized that I was committed to him. I wanted to be honest and for him to understand the relationship I had with my siblings and parents. Well, I have yet to live it down and it becomes the cause and effect of alk the arguements and disagreements that we have and have had. It is a hard decision for your wife to come to the conclusion that she needed to tell you about the ahuse. I applaud her strength.

I would suggest that you seek counselling before you tell your children. Maybe now is not the right time for the 9 year old to know and maybe it is the right time for ur oldest. Also the counselor can help to explain what would be appropriate to say for each age group. I told my son when he was 16 because (1) my husband kept threatening to tell him in a very negative way, (2) because I do sometimes get down (depressed) and he needs to understand it, and (3) my son started asking me what his father said when we were arguing (he sometimes said I liked what my dad did to me).

I dont think it will change the path they are on. Child abuse is taught in high school so they have some understanding. My son was understanding and sympathetic and has become protective and supportive. Please seek help for everyone's sake.

Good luck

[Hi To Everyone I Am New]

Hi all! Thank you so much for the words of encouragement. I really didn't think that it would make a difference whether I would get comments or not, but it does. I was very anxious about comming back because i thought no one would respond and I didn't to get hurt. It would have been confirmed what I thought whichs that no one cared about me and that I am alone. I am very excited about getting better and stronger. I look forward to knowing what happiness and peacefulness feels like in my next 50 years. I also hope that I can be as helpful and encouraging to you all and others.

From my heart

[Hi]

Hey Sara,

Sorry for posting to your page. I am new also and didnt understand how to go about posting. I hope that I can be of sone support and or encouragement to you as I work through my issues as well.

[Hi To Everyone I Am New]

Hi! I am a survivor of childhood sexual abuse by my father as well as one of my brothers. My syblings and I were beat with belts, switches, straps, shoes and hands mostly by my mother. My father physically fought with several of my brothers to the point that there were holes in the walls, police called and blood spilled on the floor. I was (still am) over weight and was picked on, teased, hit, put down, and told I was ugly by most of my syblings for the majority of my life. I was pretty much a loaner and stopped my emotions and told my self that things could be worse. I graduated from HS at 17 and moved out immediately there after. 3 years after that I left the state. 5 years later, I married a verbally abusive man. Then I was diagnosed with Lupus and breast cancer in both of my breast. The verbal abuse escalated. And so presently I am on anxiety and depression medications. I am seeing a psychologist so that I can figure out how to leave him and get in touch with Myself (hence the name Memememe). My psychologist suggested that I join a local support group. I looked in my area and could not find one that I felt addressed my issues. My psychologist said that this is a defense mechanism that I have developed. I have shut off my feelings. I cant cry, i feel sorry for those who have abused me, I dont feel that I am deserving of things. I am a perfect target for abuse. So I searched for help and found After Silence. I want to be better and I feel that joining this group is a good beginning. Thanks in advance for reading this and your support.

[Hi]

Hi! I am a survivor of childhood sexual abuse by my father as well as one of my brothers. My syblings and I were beat with belts, switches, straps, shoes and hands mostly by my mother. My father physically fought with several of my brothers to the point that there were holes in the walls, police called and blood spilled on the floor. I was (still am) over weight and was picked on, teased, hit, put down, and told I was ugly by most of my syblings for the majority of my life. I was pretty much a loaner and stopped my emotions and told my self that things could be worse. I graduated from HS at 17 and moved out immediately there after. 3 years after that I left the state. 5 years later, I married a verbally abusive man. Then I was diagnosed with Lupus and breast cancer in both of my breast. The verbal abuse escalated. And so presently I am on anxiety and depression medications. I am seeing a psychologist so that I can figure out how to leave him and get in touch with Myself (hence the name Memememe). My psychologist suggested that I join a local support group. I looked in my area and could not find one that I felt addressed my issues. My psychologist said that this is a defense mechanism that I have developed. I have shut off my feelings. I cant cry, i feel sorry for those who have abused me, I dont feel that I am deserving of things. I am a perfect target for abuse. So I searched and found After Silence. I want to be better and I feel that joining this group is a good beginning. Thank you all for your support.