Towhomitmayconcern

Welcome back

Technically it's not a new relationship because we have been dating a year but it's the only one I've had since I was raped by my ex boyfriend. I find that when I'm with my new boyfriend I'm happy and that I do not tend to think about what happened to me and it's great. But when he leaves it all comes rushing back and I wonder if I really do love him like I think I do or if I'm just using him to cope. He is the only person in the world that knows about what happened to me apart from you lot, he was my best friend and still is and I'd never want to lose him. To sum everything up I'm just confu

I don't really know why I ended up hear but lately I've been having flashbacks and panic attacks to that day. At the time I knew what he was doing was wrong and I said no but I decided that it wasn't that big of a deal. I knew that if I told anyone he would get into huge trouble and I thought he loved me at that point so I kept quiet, but I haven't been able to move on with my life and it's scaring me

I'm glad I'm not the only one thinking that

I'm new as well and I hope that a year later maybe I can feel better about myself and stop blaming it on me