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vakry

M. Member
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Everything posted by vakry

  1. Welcome to AS! You have a wonderful positive attitude
  2. vakry

    Hello.

    Any forum. Just 10 total. Welcome to AS
  3. Welcome! I'm also hailing from the sunny state!
  4. What I like to do is say trigger warning and explain what might be in the post I think could be sensitive ... Example: Trigger warning: contains self harm - not graphic or graphic. Trigger warning for profanity. Trigger warning for graphic detail of abuse. A run down of what I think might trigger. If I am not sure it's a trigger I will put the warning anyway and again the topic I plan to bring up and let others decide if they want to read. Most my posts will have a trigger warning or should have one. See my name I'm a walking trigger warning. .. I also want to take a moment to urge self care.
  5. You know it's bad when numb is the only way to function

    1. Ember

      Ember

      ((((Vakry))))

    2. vakry

      vakry

      (((Liv)))

  6. Having a hard time breathing

  7. Having a hard time breathing

    1. NorskyCourtney

      NorskyCourtney

      So sorry, Vak. Sitting with you, if you need.

    2. Ember

      Ember

      I'm sitting with you too J! Gentle hugs to you my friend.

    3. vakry

      vakry

      thank you

  8. outta control

    1. Ember

      Ember

      Here for you (((J))). Just remember that God is still in control. He will never leave you nor forsake you and that is His promise. In your darkest hour you can rely upon that.

  9. vakry

    My Teal Trigger

    The color trigger has been around for since I can remember. At first ... I got a memory of having a teal shirt as a little boy at a playground, but no context as to what significance the color is. People that wear bright teal shirts trigger me. Not too many people like this color so ... it has not happened often thankfully. I bought a rainbow wig with teal in it. that made me uncomfortable, but I was okay with that. I put teal in my signature for a while. I went from uncomfortable to perfectly okay with it. I did a number of things with teal. It seemed like it was no longer a trigger. Then som
  10. I don't care what they say... God is with me.

    1. Ember

      Ember

      What, then, shall we say in response to these things? If God is for us, who can be against us?

      Romans 8:31

      ...I am with you always, even unto the end of the world. Amen.

      Matthew 28:20

      So we say with confidence, "The Lord is with me; I will not be afraid. What can mere mortals do to me?"

      Hebrews 13:6

    2. vakry

      vakry

      Thank you, Liv :)

    3. vakry

      vakry

      That's exactly what I mean.

  11. vakry

    Train Wreck

    sorry... I didn't mean to dredge up your past with my stupidity
  12. vakry

    Train Wreck

    I did it to myself. It is my fault. I am okay taking the responsibility. It does not harm me to do so. I own it. I don't put my sins on the devil I don't blame other people. I blame myself. I did it. I just have trouble un-doing it. It's my fault they are texting me. It's my fault I answer. It's my fault I've cheated with them. It's my fault I didn't cut ties. It's my fault I'm a bit of a w**re. Ya, I didn't just do it to do it. There was some manipulation here. I don't just give it up for free. There is a price. Price depends on what I want. The more sadistic and twisted their fantasies are t
  13. Tired of people mentioning my sleeping patterns. Days like this I want to regress so hard back into my habits. At least when I was a drunk I didn't give a shit what people said and when I was drunk no one tried to pawn off responsibilities on me or relied on me. I have an entire history of not being able to be relied on that. I kinda want to keep that reputation. Leave me the fuck alone!!! It's not my problem. It's not my obligation. No, I will not be guilted or conned into it. I will do it out of the kindness of my heart on my own in my own way and time not on your fucked up watch. You don't
  14. cant be strong when I need to be when I want to be

  15. vakry

    Poem

    broken hearted betrayed questions never sated Pain never ceases desires never lost Contentment in misery rising verbal vomit splattered too far of a dark splotch staining the soul marked the number of days withering grace burning hate seething pain engorged mental strain
  16. vakry

    Get It Together

    -trigger- profanity at very end. Bring it in. Lock it up. Bars and all. Chain in it. Hold it inside.... Please let's be my old self to-night.... He is there. Deep inside. trembling and scared. It's safe for now. It will hold. Check the deadbolts thirteen times. Come on James. Come and show. I need you.... Smile. Laugh. Joke. It's not fake. It is you. You're not a liar it is true. God... come on. You can do it. Get with it. vakry. valkerie. valhalla. strong and true this is you You've gone through worse. You made it thought the storm. you can do this. I'm such a liar. This is not working. I jus
  17. vakry

    I So Relate....

    http://www.sisterclaire.com/index.php?id=280 Just this page. I know hard without content... but that's how I feel sometimes.. like I just don't belong... disturbing.. people say things I know they mean as compliments.. but it stings! IT STINGS!!!! It hurts so much http://www.sisterclaire.com/index.php?id=359 is how I really am inside.
  18. vakry

    I Wanted To

    I was raped.... Again.... AGAIN~!
  19. vakry

    I Wanted To

    tape it up shut the door lock it up keep it in real painful pill to swallow posion inside. weeping seeping locked in the night prisoned in sick thoughts I long since lost my fight....... I long since lost my fight
  20. Welcome back! I'm new.. ish. I've only been around since September. Congrats on marriage and kiddo. I have a 3yo too. Such a lovely age. Thank you for your offer
  21. Yeah it means people deleted it. I start doing that in waves so people might be getting that from mine too. I do it to those that are getting old or "resolved" as in nothing really new to add to conversation. I start fresh if I have something to say to person or they start new one too. Only so much space in box so good to clear out them once in a while.
  22. Don't get excited. I just missed my rainbow

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