fallenstar

Hi there fallenstar! 

Thank you Star! 

@josiel and @ActivistAlly

Way to go you! I love playing my guitars.

Thanks it's a fun hobby that I miss. That's awesome you play, too!

great! happy for you

No worries dear take care of yourself.  I hope you begin to feel better.  Safe to you if okay.  Dark room and silence always helped me.  

Safe hugs and take ❤ for now. When you can come back we will still be here.

Thank you so much everyone! Migraines are gone. I'm feeling the love and I give it back to you all 

Have fun! Good luck!

Good luck and have fun dear

Thanks you two. 

Thank you!

Happy 4th @fallenstar!

Same, @Bluesclues, same.  

You're very welcome @8888 and @snmls 

Happy Canada Day to all my AS Canadian friends.

   Canada. 

Happy Canada Day fallenstar!!

Try to get some rest dear.  Safe if okay

Thanks @Painnbroken I definitely will try to sneak nap in today. Thanks for the hugs 

You're welcome anytime 

YAY!!!

You have been brave to leave abusive partners. They were never worthy of you. I do think there are good people out there, many who would be loving and kind. The challenge is to figure out who they are.I haven't mastered that, so I understand the mourning of the potential for love. You deserve better. We all do.

Thanks Mary. I know there are good people out there, they just don't want to ever be with someone like me. I agree we all deserve better. 

Personally, I think there are three types of people we come across.

1. The bad.  
2. The good that may be scared off by the issues and struggles we have (or even maybe their own). 
3. The good who would look past the issues and struggles we have and see our own goodness.

I am certain it's this third group that we have difficulty finding. I have experienced the second group, too, so I do understand how you may come to believe that. It would be nice if GPS existed that hones in on that group #3, as it would give us more hope that there really is potential out there for us.

AGREED!!!! I love you all as well! 

Always! Any time you need me!

If you want you can pm me anytime. Its not quite the same as a phone call, but its human feedback. I'm here if you want.

I agree with mermaidgirl , I will listen too his you ever need an ear.  

Many thanks again MermaidGirl and Free!! 

No need to feel sorry. Sometimes dealing with our issues means more time on the site, sometimes less. As long as you realize we are here for you when you need it and are able to reach out.  You are not alone, as I'm sitting with you, even if you haven't asked. to you, if ok. 

 No worries, star! 

The truest contradiction of life. You are supported.   to you.

Thanks Mary!! for you too!

Take care of yourself     

We have to take care of ourselves. Get what you need done and we will be here.

Take care, and  sense I am late seeings this, glad you back in full form

Thank you, fallenstar.

One of our board members who was especially beloved passed away yesterday. He was like a surrogate grandpa to me. He made a HUGE deal about me finishing my degree. He always encouraged me. He always asked about me. When I finally graduated, he made a big fuss over me. When he found out I was the one in the newspapers/media about my attack, he cried. 

I am going to allow myself to cry, in front of people or not, and mourn his loss without judging myself...

@Iheartcupcakes I'm very sorry for your loss. I'm glad you are giving yourself the chance to grieve in your way without judgement.

Thank you, fallenstar. I usually will not cry in front of people but I can when it is for others...just not myself. I don't know why.

ive felt that way to. i believe it will have to be something we repeat to ourselves like the bad stuff was repeated. 

too *

There's an old movie from before I was born. It's called "Pretty Woman". In that movie Julia Roberts plays a prostitute. There's a famous scene in the movie where she is complimented and then she says "the bad things are easier to believe".

If we are told we are stupid, ugly, unworthy, etc, we will start to believe that's the truth. Eventually we are tricked into thinking that we KNOW those things are true. The same thing happens when we tell ourselves we are stupid, ugly or unworthy. Sometimes we get so used to being lonely or get so used to a repetitive cycle of being a "bum magnet", that we forget that we are WORTHY of more. When we start to doubt we are worthy of happiness, love and companionship, we wonder stuff like will anyone "ever truly love me".

We are our own worst enemies. Not as much because we are mean to ourselves, but because we don't challenge the negative beliefs that others send our way. When we don't challenge those negative feelings, the question of things like, will anyone "ever truly love me", become oppressive. It all becomes a self-destructive cycle empowered by doubt, fear and circumstance.

I suspect, like many, many other people, you have difficulty believing or feeling other people will ever truly love you, because somewhere along the lines, circumstance and negative influence has caused you to view yourself as less worthy than you really are. I also suspect to a degree, some of the love you have for yourself has also been damaged.

I want you to know, you are worthy. You are valuable. You are lovable. You are deserving of true love from others and from YOURSELF. Never forget that.

 

I am very well Star.... been doing a lot of stuff in therapy and although I knew of my Inner Child I have found out about 8 more insiders of various ages and sexes.  I am so glad that my T - Mark  is good with them.  We have had some hiccups in the past few months  but  generally things are good.  Hope you and your son and of course all the Insiders are doing well too. 

Jo

I am glad you have found that reliable source of support. I'm sure we all appreciate you as well.

i miss you, too, Copper!

yay! 

  Sitting with you, if it helps.

Sorry to hear you are feeling that way.   Sitting with you too if okay.

Thanks so much Mary and Ally!! 

my husband gets restless leg syndrome, he takes tonic water just before he goes to bed. It works from him. Our daughter is a pharmacies , she say there is something in tonic water that will help, I can't remember the name of, I will ask my husband. may be worth a try

Thanks so much Patricia, please keep me posted.

Was just talking to my daughter it is Quinine that is the water, she said you can a perscription  from the doctor for a higher dose but you can take the diet tonic water to see if that helps first, y husband thinks it has to be diet tonic water , but just check it to see if has quinine in it.