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  1. absolutely. that might be even more hurtful than what people who live outside your body would say. anyways, i'd be very interested to hear that. i don't have alters, but "singletons" (non-DID folks) often have conflicted consciousness. i have said more invalidating things to myself than anyone else! hm, maybe we should all post on here what we have said to ourselves, whether that be what alters have said or what we as a singleton said to ourself! i have said things like "stop your f*cking whining you pathetic little b*tch" ... don't say that anymore, tho, thank god.
  2. there's already a "sexual harassment" thread. but after reading through it, people only seem to be posting about sexual harassment that was done by peers (coworkers, random dudes on the street or at a club). but i think that my two friends who i mentioned, who experienced non-contact sexual abuse from their fathers, would not think of themselves as part of that thread. i think that what is sexual harassment for an adult counts as sexual abuse when the victim is a child. i also think that, at any age, if the perpetrator of sexual harassment is a family member, this is sexual abuse. i'm an adult
  3. dear 3 year old me; when i do think of you, it's usually with hatred and disgust. i have mentally murdered you and inflicted brutal violence on you so many times. i have wished you were not a part of me. i have wished you were not a part of humanity. i have been your worst abuser. when i hurt you, i hurt myself. thanks to aftersilence, and to deep contemplation, i really think i'm getting over my hatred for you! i'm so close. you don't deserve hatred, and i'm sorry. i don't know if i can get over being disgusted with you, though. don't even know if i want to. don't feel like you/we deserv
  4. no offense, but i despise your grandmother!!! never thought i could despise a little old lady, lol, esp. one i never met. but seriously, wtf is wrong with her?! it boggles my mind how some human beings can be just such total shits. she may not be a child molester but sounds just as awful!
  5. a friend of mine, after i told her my brother sexually abused me: "why are you telling me this?" (why are you a compassionless jerk?) lol. i can laugh now about what a sh*t she was (it was 12+ years ago). but at the time i was so humiliated! oh, and this is a good one. i used to get triggered during sexual contact with my boyfriend when i was 17. so he wouldn't take it personally, i told him the reason i sometimes cringe and flinch when touched is because i was sexually abused when i was a kid. his response: "yeah, but i didn't do that to you, so why are you so jumpy?" LOL. i wasn't at
  6. to my brother: YOU BETTER NOT BE LYING [that you'd never hurt anyone else that way again] to the anonymous rapist: how many others you rape? just wanted to say i love this thread. reading through it helps me feel empowered!
  7. you are so very welcome. for years i felt isolated because my type of abuse was (i thought) so different from the 'normal' experience. in more ways than one, but one thing was that my abuser was another minor, my brother. in the book "the courage to heal", all the case studies are people abused by adults. i have since overcome that feeling of isolation, by reading a book called "sibling abuse", but i remember how awful it was, so i think i retain a sensitivity to others feeling isolated about their abuse experiences. i don't want anyone to feel that way. that's why i love the "sexual assault:
  8. As we know, some victims of sexual abuse are coerced to participate in someone else's sexual abuse. I've heard several stories of abusers coercing children to do sexual things with other children. Sometimes an adult and child are coerced to be sexual together, and neither are willing participants. Like the case in Florida where a gang of teen boys raped a woman at gunpoint, forced her 12 year old son to watch, then forced them to have sex. http://www.msnbc.msn.com/id/19636099/ Being coerced to abuse someone else is another thing that (thankfully!) was not part of my abuse experience. But I t
  9. thank you, found! i also have another friend who was sexually abused but with no physical contact. we have lost touch and haven't spoken in about a year so i had forgotten about her story when i first posted this suggestion. her father would sometimes walk around the house naked. he would watch pornography in the living room when the kids were around. and there was one incident in particular when she was 12 which has given her ptsd. he was in his room lying on the bed with the door open. she was walking by and he called her name. he said: come here, i have something for you. she looked in a
  10. you are very right that we have to be cautious regarding statistics of rapes, sexual assault, and violence, and what the sex ratio is of the victims and of the perpetrators. there can be problems in the reporting, or in the way the questions are presented, or in not admitting to things due to societal stigma or minimization (for instance, the minimization of rape and sexual assault perpetrated by a female). however, statistics about murders are very reliable, because almost all murders are discovered and reported (unlike most assault, rapes, etc.) and almost all of the reported murders are s
  11. i agree that most males are not rapists or abusers or murderers. i was just saying they're much more likely to be rapists and abusers, and murderers, than females. so it's not unreasonable for females and for males to be more cautious of males relative to females.
  12. statistically speaking, it's illogical to be more afraid/mistrustful of females than of males. but most people's fears aren't based on statistical probabilities, they're based on our own experiences. and there are those of us who were abused only by a female(s), or by both a male(s) and a female(s). i'm sure there are people, male and female, who do deal with fear/mistrust of females. fewer than deal with fear/mistrust of males, but enough that it can warrant its own thread. so how about two pinned threads. one "fear/mistrust of males" and the other "fear/mistrust of females." i think that'
  13. these are excerpts from posts i made on what's been called the "child exploitation" thread, but i'm copying/pasting them here to bring it to the mods/admins attention. ----------------------------- i think the title for this space is confusing/unclear. when i read it i didn't know what it meant. i thought, "isn't child sexual abuse pretty much ALWAYS child exploitation?" i'm still not totally clear on the meaning, but judging from what others wrote i think it's for those used in pornography or prostitution. but then i'm confused again because there's already a space for prostitution. so mayb
  14. this is a long thread and i don't have time to read through all the replies, so i'm sorry if this has already been suggested. i deeply sympathize that these comments can be hurtful to males on the site and they shouldn't have to see that stuff and be triggered by it in a space which is supposed to be safe. then again, i think it's understandable that some people (both male and female) who were SA'd by males to struggle with these negative views of males. it may inhibit their healing if they have to inhibit expressing these feelings. so as a compromise, maybe a specific thread in the "after
  15. hi there. the "Sexual Assault: Different Types" forum i find very helpful for finding people who have had similar experiences to mine. i have a suggestion for another thread for that forum, a thread for sexual abuse with no physical contact. my sexual abuse did involve physical contact, but i know that even when it doesn't it can still be damaging. i have a friend whose father perpetrated non-contact sexual abuse on her, and she has been effected similarly to those who have experienced sexual abuse with contact. i.e. she used to struggle with bulimia, she has issues with sex and relationshi
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