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katy89

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About katy89

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    K.an A.ngels T.rust & Y.earn

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    Female

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    Survivor

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  1. A lot of people seem confused over what the forum is there for. Some posts that seem encouraging and to fit are being moved. One was moved to a volunteering section. Down below is a thread listing member's confusion on this matter http://www.aftersilence.org/forum/index.php?showtopic=83057
  2. this is an amazing idea. This covers so many fields even verbal sexual abuse!!! I would benefit greatly. I had a lot of sexual abuse from the men the drank at the bars I worked in. They made "some"physical contact but mostly verbal and hand genstures so would greatly appreicate this. Hope to see it up
  3. you don't have to make it so formal where every profile has their blogging/journal section, you could add a journal/blog forum under these precious things forums, or even a sub forum under healing through creativity. Although it should probably get it's own forum under these precious things for if you do it as a subforum it may not get as many views.
  4. What if we had a blogging forum, where we could post blogs, our thoughts, views, on anything. I know a lot of people here would have a lot to offer.
  5. I understand if there are reasons this will not work.... Dont get me wrong, I am very greatful for the chat, but I feel like at times, there it can be a lose/lose situation with trigger warnings, someone always gets outted. Some people really need to vent and get some stuff out, but are apprehensive because they don't wanna upset anyone so they end up holding in. I know I feel so guilty when I put up a *TW* and everyone leaves. And at the same point it seems unfair that people who need a safe place (and often have no safe place to turn other then here) have to leave because they are in a delicate place and trigger easily. What if we had two chat rooms, one like now where trigger warnings are allowed and one that is not allowed to have triggering conversation? Kinda like a simply life chat? That way, no one feels guilty, outted, or holds back on what they need to talk about. And if the triggering conversation proves to be too much there is always a safe place for them to go. Just a thought
  6. My boyfriend has been bruised and effected deeply by what happened. If I recommended him to join for support (He would never mention he knew me, he would just be like a random member) what boards would he have access to? I dont want him to see my posts. He is just very much alone in dealing with this.
  7. I know there is oral, anal and foreign object rape and I would really appreciate if we could add finger rape? I know a lot of people (including myself) can sometimes feel like their rape is less because it's fingers but fingers can be just as violent and traumatizing. I just could really use this. Thank you! Another thread I think would be good is attempted assault for people who almost didn't get away and were really traumatized (I dealt with this growing up) But I understand if you don't wanna both, but please, I really could really use the finger rape thread, I think knowing who else went through this would help me a lot in coming to terms with my rape! Thank you! Thank you!
  8. Invalidation. Words Can Hurt!

    A lot of ones have come from my best friend. She didn't mean to. She just says what she thinks. She has stood up for me about my rape to everyone including her own father (I'll get to that later)> Whenever I feel guilty she reassures me it wasn't my fault over and over. she's the one who encouraged me to go to the hospital. But words can still hurt even if unintentional. She will NOT talk about what happened. And some of what she has said "why didn't you scream?" I made a joke because I had to go to court over my rape and SHES the one who told me I should call the cops and I said "this is a fine mess you've gotten me into" and she says "I'm not the one who told you to get drunk at his apartment alone." My aunt "well you must've wanted it a little bit, I mean didn't you know something was up when it was just you two at his apartment" a friend (a guy friend) "why didn't you fight back? You should lie and tell people you fought back with all your migt because it makes you seem more sypmathetic" and then I was talking about how my boyfriend felt about what happened and he said "You don't understand, your boyfriend does not see you anymore when he looks at you, he sees what happened, you are broken in his eyes and you have to suck it up and deal with it. If he wants to make out or whatever you have to get over it and do you he wants he needs it more then you now" I know for a fact all of this is a not true about my boyfriend And the best is...... my friends' father came over at my house at 10 at night... to tell my mom that my rape was all her fault. That if she knew what she was doing I wouldn been raped! And I shouldnt made the choice to call the cops, it's not my place that my parents should decide that for me (even though im 21)
  9. None Intercourse Rape

    thank you!!!!
  10. Why Do I Seek Out Triggers?

    OMG I am so glad this here. I felt like such a freak for this.I think for me I do it because I have such doubts. I rationalize what I went through and try to excuse him a lot. Triggering put myself right back there and I am reassured.
  11. None Intercourse Rape

    Yeh I bassicly mean when you are penetrated and assaultd with something other then a penis . It can be just as horrific and violent.
  12. I think it would be good to have a forum under the types of assault forums for rapes with fingers, objects and such.
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