marcyabadeer
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@marcyabadeer, thank you friend same to you, I'm doing okay will be better once it cools down here.
I'm sorry you've found yourself feeling like you have to try that, honestly I've found myself wanting to just forget it but it's always there.
Safe hugs
if ok?
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@Free2Fly thank you for the safe hugs, safe hugs to you also
i hope it starts to cool down where you are 🥵
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@marcyabadeer, your welcome, and thank you for the hugs
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Yeah well it should be cooling down today so hopefully although thunder is expected.
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you are a fraud 😢 taking others words and making them your own. how could you be so cold and awful?
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@Free2Flythank you. I’m feeling idk, grossed out by people and their intentions.
@tuliptornnope not talking about myself this time 😆 but thank you for your kindness my friend
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@feralcat thank you for some insight. It does feel like a morbid curiosity. I want answers or understanding of some kind but I know I won’t find that where I’m looking
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marcyabadeer changed their profile photo
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So lovely to see you back, sending much love 🧡 B
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Goldie- you are not fragile my friend. It is about that time when we start to realize things for what they were and feel traumatized again. Being numb to the repeated abuse is the way we survived. Now that we are safe from that treatment, we can’t help but see how things were so out of hand with the abuse. It is normal that we collapse every once in a while- we survived horrible things. I am sorry you are feeling this way. Sitting with you always 🌻
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Thank you Kim. I hope you can feel and know that you are blameless also friend we just need to remind each other I guess because our own minds won’t allow us to believe it yet 🌻
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@Houston Kim thank you for your validation. It’s pretty messed up to be honest- we all let the victim blaming culture alter how we view the situations we experienced. Even if it is blatantly rape/ assault/ abuse I think the idea of telling our stories we feel the need to almost be defense attorneys questioning our own credibility in all of this. I don’t think that’s very fair. And I’m mad it’s the way things are. It shouldn’t be like this. I don’t want to think these ways. I would never discredit anyone else and it’s maddening we are so quick to do this to ourselves. sam
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@Celia thank you i think I remain hard on myself because idk how else to be. Although a piece of me is genuinely surprised you don’t think I am stupid or foolish or ignorant- something. I just wish I could know why or why me. I obsess with finding answers and since I can’t ask him I guess my default is to go to the memories and I cringe thinking about the things that happened before I knew what he was capable of it’s numbing! thank you for sitting with me and the safe hugs- safe hugs back to you sam🖤🌻
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trigger warning 15-dirty deeds
marcyabadeer commented on marcyabadeer's blog entry in into the cave we wander
Gosh Celia, thank you for saying these things 😢 I have been feeling very depressed lately and reading these responses has made me feel a bit uplifted. Thank you for sitting with me 🌻 -
trigger warning 15-dirty deeds
marcyabadeer commented on marcyabadeer's blog entry in into the cave we wander
Thank you for taking time to read my story I am so sorry you can relate. I am short on words at the moment but I really wanted to acknowledge That you said very heartwarming things to me and I really appreciate it all at this time especially. I appreciate you 🌻 -
i’m stuck here
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@Free2Fly thank you. Safe hugs back to you
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I will sit with you in the loneliness if ok? I know when I am affected by things around me, I also tend to take it very personally and wonder what is so wrong with ME? I can say because I am an extremely empathetic person, things bother me a little more and I internalize issues that may not have anything specifically to do with me. Leaving me feel burnt out and unworthy of basic human social interaction. You are worthy of companionship with your partner. My partner is currently in therapy so it makes it slightly a bit easier for him to be a little more sympathetic but he wasn’t alwa
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sitting with you if ok? You are not alone- I feel this way too much lately 💔 sending support to you sam🖤🌻
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trigger warning 16-bury me alive, some days i'm dead inside
marcyabadeer commented on marcyabadeer's blog entry in into the cave we wander
@Houston Kim, thank you so much for your endless support 💜 hugs are always welcome thank you for reminding me where the shame is warranted- I struggle too much with blaming myself sam🖤🌻
