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About Midnight_Dreamer

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  • Birthday 12/06/1986

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  1. My mom has said all of these and they still hurt when I think of them "Well I knew about it but you just had to keep going around them didnt you?" "It's been three yrs now just get over it already." "Well you heard the police man it couldnt have possibly been r*pe are you sure?" "You need to stop letting them ruin your life." My ab*sers all said these "You deserve this." "Well you are just a little wh*re anyway so what's the harm?" "I am getting what you owe me."
  2. Welcome to after silence..I hope you can find some help here I have...... welcome.
  3. I joined AS in October and I found that the people here really understand because they have been through abuse maybe not exactly the same thing but they do know what it is like to be on rock bottem because of some man. and I learned that here speaking freely is perfectly ok and the people really try to help I have really benifited from joining and I jope you will to
  4. Christmas isnt a very good time for me either. The first time I was rap*ed was right after christmas three days after christmas every yr I still get very deppressed around Christmas. I am always walkng around on egg shells trying not to let anyone see that I am upset since no one knows. I dont know if it is the same with you. but I just thought I would let you know I understand where you are coming from
  5. I am new too but I think I am going to be comfortable here hopefully you will be too
  6. 1)The infamous, what's your favorite color?Purple 2) What's your favorite animal?Cats 3) If you could meet one person, dead or alive, who would you want to meet?Harriet Tubman 4) If you could turn into any animal for a day, what animal would you turn into and what would you do? I would want to be a cat so I could sleep all day and not feel bad for it 5) If you could have any job what would it be?Neonadle Nurse 6) If you could be any age for the rest of your llife, what age would you want to be?18 (I like my age) 7) What's your favorite smiley?The hug smiley 8) Are you an early bird or a night owl? night owl 9) What's your favorite holiday? Christmas 10) If you were stranded on a desert island and could only have one thing with you, what would you bring? my computer 11) What's your favorite food? homemade pizza 12) If you could spend one day doing anything you wanted to, no matter how much it cost or anything, how would you spend that day? I would go to Canada and do everything at Niagra Falls 13) If you could be an actor/actress in any movie, what movie would you want to be in? Dirty Dancing patrick Swayzee oh yea. 14) If you could have your hair any color, what color would it be?Blonde like it is (natuarally) 15) What's your favorite sport to watch? gymnastics 16) What's your favorite sport to play? none
  7. This is my first time here I feel that I am finally ready to talk about what happened. December the 28 will be four yrs since the first time I was raped. I love December in a way and in a way I hate it and wish it would never come around. He ruined what used to be the happiest time of yr for me. I still hold very much hate in my heart for him and dont know how to get rid of it. I want to post one of my poems but first a Pearl Jam lyric. "on the edge of a Christmas clean love young virgin held from heaven visiting. Yea but to the man above her she just aint nothin she doesnt like the view, she doesnt like the view, she doesnt like the view but he sinks himself deep cant touch the bottom."----Pearl Jam deep Now for my poem I hope it gets out the message I wanted..... Terry: why did you treat me that way why did you call me those names? I didnt even know you were there, I thought I was alone but you didnt care. You dont even know me but that night you controled me. you told me its ok its just sex, I said no but you were convinced. So you hit me hard again and again. I told myself I would not give in. But then I fell to the floor I told myself I was sorry I just couldnt take anymore. you drug me into that room across those boards did you have to shut the door? I screamed, I cried, I bit, I scratched all in that world made of black. I prayed God help me maybe he tried maybe its me. Then you yelled shut up sl*t but I wasnt going to shut up. so you grabbed me by the hair of my head and slammed it into the wall above the bed. Then the tears started to shed as you got up got dressed and left. Left me crying wishing you would die, left me hurting and wondering why?
  8. Hey Heather I am new too I think it takes a lot of courage to get your story out there who knows it may just help somone
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