i have about a month or two wait to see the therapist. in that time i really need to figure out what it is i am looking for help with fixing.

sleep is the main issue. i get about two to three hours a day. i think it affects everything else. without sleep i dont have drive or peace or relaxation.

stress could be causing my sleep issues, however, i have always had sleep issues and not always stress.

depression could cause the sleep issues or sleep deprivation could cause the depression. maybe both are related to the stress in life.

S/A D/V issues could be affecting my sleep. or the stress of the issues are doing it or maybe they are causing the depression that affects the stress and sleep. maybe i wouldnt be dealing with S/A and D/V if i could get enough rest.

i feel like trying to find the root of my issues is like trying to find the beginning and end to untangle a celtic knot.

at the same time, i keep forgetting i have problems and carry on like all is ok.

all the while i do all this, i keep hoping life will end soon.