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i never remember dreams i have. i cant ever remember having a dream but nightmares are a different story. i remember my nightmares in vivid detail and lately i have been having some devastating recurring nightmares that are destroying my sleep. i am only asleep for 30 minutes to an hour and wake up with my heart racing and every muscle aching. i can fall right back to sleep but i go right back into the nightmares. even if i find something to distract myself for an hour before i go back i still return to the nightmares. when i was a child i would have nightmares often and only found comfort in having animals and pillows in bed with me to hide me while i slept. i find that i have been doing the same thing lately. i have my dog, my husband, two body pillows and four regular pillows and still feel exposed and unsafe while i sleep. what a strange thing to have to return to after so many years of being ok with being by myself.


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