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Green

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Why is it that the relief I get from talking to you always fizzles out into guilt, despair and the feeling of having done something awful by opening up? Don't know if seeing you each week is helping me. It just seems to bring out a ton of self hate and criticism. At the same time though the relief I feel is incredible. I need to learn how to stop being horrible to myself and doubting and worrying over every little thing I say and even the things you say too. When I have breaks from seeing you I can stuff everything away and have some kind of life that isn't consumed by talking and analyzing what's been said. I also know that squashing things away isn't going to make them stay away forever. Im just fed up of being eaten alive by my own thoughts. Please help me make it stop?

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