Because a really great friend sent me something to lift my spirits today and it helped, I think I should list the positives for the day (no matter how small)
I laughed today - I genuinely laughed and smiled. I dont even remember what for (probably a silly TikTok) but I did it and that is what matters.
No tears today - It hurts and I miss her still but I didnt cry and that is ok. It doesnt mean I dont miss her any more or less than the day before or that I have forgotten her.
I was productive - I finally did someone's taxes that I have been holding on for about 3 and a half weeks. I sat done and did it even though it only took about 15-20 mins to do. It is one less item on the to-do list.
I ate and drank today - I didnt have to think about it. I didn't have to wonder when the last time I ate or drank. I just did it and I didnt need someone to sit with me while I did it. Something I havent done consistently for 2 weeks now.
I watched a TV show and actually paid attention to it - I havent done that in nearly a month and I enjoyed the show.
I got out the house - It was just to the store but I did it without feeling like it was a burden to even get dressed to do it.
I woke up on time - Getting to sleep is a task so waking up with enough time to actually start work is a job well-done in my book.
I sat outside and enjoyed it - LOL this one will change when the weather really heats up and the bugs come out but I sat on the porch and enjoyed the fresh air.
It's a short list but they are things that have been hard to enjoy since that day. I know that tomorrow may not be this good. I know tomorrow could be even better. One day the list will be longer and then I can look back at it as that being an accomplishment too. For now, these things give me hope that one day it wont hurt as much.