I Hate Anniversaries
I guess this is probably the best place to share this...I hate anniversaries of events I cannot forget...since I was 13 years old, year after year...I have had to recall the event that really destroyed my life...I blamed myself for years, never calling it what it really was, never giving it a name...but every year on that day- a little part of me died inside, because I kept telling myself "you should not have been there"....I hate that day, I cried all year long, year after year after year....and then one night, the night before the anniversary while in labor- I cried out to God "you wouldn't dare do this to me!"....yes, God did do this to me..for on the following morning, the day that was the anniversary I delivered a newborn baby. I was horrified and angry! Now what was I suppose to do with this evil horrible day...this day that I could not live through year after year after year? I remember yelling out at God "how can you do this to me?" ...and then somewhere I heard a small voice whisper to me "there wasn't any other way to heal you!"....this horrible day, this day I could not live through year after year after year- was now a lovely, treasured, blessed day! But there is still that little voice in me that whispers back to God "you have 365 days a year....why did you have to pick this one?"...and His answer has always been the same "there was no other way..."
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