My Heart Is Heavy...but I Get It!
Entry posted by Flataffect7 ·
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Had lunch with my youngest the other day (she's 32) and she told me she was seeing a therapist.
She reminded me of how I failed her, and as hard as it is to hear I GET IT!
She is angry with me most of the time these days, and she is very sensitive of disappointment.
But you know what? I GET IT! I really, really do.
It's now my job to absorb the negativity, to be a sounding board and a soft place for her to fall
when she needs it.
I die a thousand deaths a day, and am continually on the verge of tears. Because I wasn't sensitive
to her tears, her fears long ago when she was my little girl. Much too self-absorbed, looking for love
in the wrong places with the wrong people...when it was there all along in my precious child who
wanted nothing more than to be seen, heard and made to feel like she mattered.
I hurt so on the inside, that sometime I don't see how I can continue, but I must.
I failed my little girl. I DID! And she hurts too.
SO YES I REALLY DO GET IT
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