I don't know where I will be in a few months, all I know is that I have to leave. I have to leave and get to a new place. Not just to start fresh, but because I can't end up like the rest of them. If I stay then I admit defeat, I admit that I can't do it. I won't let it happen. I will leave.
Every time I come back to this town it literally hurts, my heart sinks and it becomes to breathe. This town is literally trying to kill me. If I get stuck here then what? Will I ever feel better, or accomplish anything?
I don't want to be famous, I don't want to be a billionaire, I just want to be happy and safe.
That answer can only happen when I live and start a new chapter in my life, I cannot continue with the same chapter forever.
It will get better, I just can't see it yet. I can't see the future but I have to trust that at some point it really will work out. It may take a long time, but I can get there. Some day.