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Day 4 entry 2: not giving up on this journal



7:19 PM: ( yesterday's entry ) promised myself I'd do this every day and already failing at it. Doing this while I'm playing a game. Today went well. In fact better than expected. Sleep last night sucked as always. Getting sick of that. Is it normal to not be able to sleep as easily when you get older?

A nurse came over to see my grandmother. She works for the organization that pays my family to look after me. Now that my grandfather is dead she financially qualifies to be part of the program. The weird part is we are better off this way rather than receiving my grandfathers check. America is such a screwed up country. My grandmother is a frail old woman in just as poor health as my grandfather. I can't believe she only just recently got health insurance. We pay all these extra taxes just to be forgotten when we are old.
I quit minecraft. Got tired of playing with a bunch of kids and foreigners that don't talk. Back to shooting zombies and nazis...... And zombie nazis. Video game companies just won't let those nazi zombies rest in peace. For some reason we keep digging them back up as if we want to indefinitely hate on Germany for world war 2.
I'm not sure if mom has the nerve to follow through with filing a lawsuit against the nursing home / hospital. She says we don't have the money and then she starts talking about paying their ex judge friend for something that has to do with Papa. As well as mentioning another lawyers name. I wish I knew what it was she wanted to do. Just like my brother said she has no will power and doesn't follow through with anything.
( Today's entry) I should do a separate medical journal to document my poor sleep and chest/stomach pains. Doctors are useless.
Woke up this morning and got myself a..... Bucket. To throw up in. Not sure why I got sick at around 5 in the morning. The area around my shunt hurts too. I'm use to that when I move my head and shoulders in a certain way, but this kind of pain is a little different. And a bit concerning. I'll see how I feel tomorrow.
Two more nurses came by today. Two separate appointments for two different things. I'm pretty sure one of them is a home care agency that my mom is trying to get rid of. My mother can check Grammy's weight and blood pressure herself.
Moms husband is at it again.....( Damn dude. Back at it again screwing up moms day with your bullshit ). Grammy's pain pills are missing. He's the only one in the house that would touch em. Of course he's playing stupid. Same as he always does when he's caught stealing. I can't believe mom left dad to eventually marry this worthless moron. And has stayed with him longer than my father. When I really think about it moms the reason why my life is so screwed up.
10:30 PM: I don't know how to explain this but basically my mom now believes someone broke into our house and stole them, and my brother knows that's not true. The window to my grandmothers room is kinda messed up. There is a board on the outside holding it up. Her husband says it wasn't like that before. Problem is its not my room so I don't know if that's true or not. My brother is pissed and wants to get a lock for our room.


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