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How often do you think about your rape, and do you ever feel like you have thoughts about it that you can’t stop?



I think about it (them?) directly at least once or twice a day, but most of my thoughts are indirect. What ifs. I find it hard to face the truth, to think about what actually happened. But the what ifs are so hard to stop, it's like I have to imagine the entire scenario, I can't stop till it's over, but it's never over. It doesn't end. I imagine being raped by strangers, acquaintances, friends, but mostly by Luke. I'm so scared that he still believes I owe him because I agreed to stay "friends with benefits", that one day something will happen in his life and he'll decide to act on this.


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I think about it whenever I am not distracted by something. I would definitely say its intrusive and I cant stop thinking about it. It always starts with a random thought and pulls me down more and more like a downward spiral. I dont want to think about it but I cant help myself. Sorry you are going through the same.

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Every time i see the person who did it my stomach sinks as i remember it. She acts like nothing ever happened.

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