**TRIGGER WARNING**

alcohol, abuse

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I am a drunken fool.

I was leaving a party and was offered a lift to the station. A friend was going in the same direction, and said he would walk me the rest of the way to the station.

He didnt take me to the station. he took me to his house. "Its not safe, the last train has left, you cannot get home. This area is not safe"

"you stay here, I will look after you"

I didn't know where i was, where the station was. Was it really dangerous outside? I went into the house.

I was uncomfortable. I tried to leave. he restrained me.

physically stopped me from leaving. and, as i drunkenly passed out, he used my body for his pleasure.

i would come to semi-conciousness and feel him on my body. Pushing him off. telling him no. drifting into unconciousness.

The cycle repeated.

and afterwards, lying there. In shock. Frozen.

I dont know how long I was lying there for. But eventually i came to.

I ran. It was 4am, in a place I didn't know. But it was safer for me on the streets.